Comments on: Mourning.

By: hilahil

hilahil — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 21:52:10 +0000

i feel like the breath has been taken out of me a little bit after reading that. my mom had an emergency hysterectomy after my birth, back in 1973, and has never talked about it with me, but i can only imagine what it must have meant to her. all i can do is send love to you and hope you can feel all the love coming at you from all over. thank you for writing so honestly (and beautifully) about it.

By: Tami

Tami — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 04:16:18 +0000

Wow Gloria,
You should be a grief counselor. Your tender words, thoughts and future perspective are so honest and heart felt. May many other women going thru this tragedy and mourning hear your voice.

By: Gloria Bell

Gloria Bell — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 17:38:45 +0000

Erin,

I have come back to this post about 10 times before I could bring myself to read it. I have intentionally skimmed over your tweets about the upcoming surgery because they pain they wrenched from my soul was unbearable. I want so bad to wrap my arms around you and let you know that despite what you feel now, that the ache does recede. You do reach that moment when the mourning subsides. I know this for a fact. I had an emergency hysterectomy 13 years ago at age 32. After a year and half of illness and almost weekly visits to the ER, 3 exploratory surgeries, 5 admissions, more tests than I can even remember and several psychiatric consultations, they finally figured out that it was the part of me that defined me as a woman that was killing me. Literally. Once they had a diagnosis, the doctors were amazed that I had survived. I had a meager 12 hours from diagnosis to surgical table. So recently wed, on the verge of starting a new life with a new husband, the future we were planning together, the children we envisioned were gone. My only consolation being the 2 beautiful sons I already had.
So Erin, as hard as this is to face, as hard as the time immediately after will be, please remember that in this, time actually does heal all wounds. There will be a time when looking at babies is again a joy and does not cause an ache. Just be sure to allow yourself time and permission to grieve, it is a loss that only others who have experienced it can understand. Something my doctor said after my surgery – I needed to grieve for the me I lost, but I also needed to celebrate the me that was to come, especially the pain-free me.
If there is ever anything I can do, please just let me know. Sending you many prayers, much love and hugs of consolation. Take care…
.-= Gloria Bell´s last blog ..Being a “not like all the others” parent… =-.

By: Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass)

Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass) — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 17:34:21 +0000

I am just finding this post and I have nothing to say except that your emotions escaped from the screen and landed in my heart. It's dramatic, yes, but this stuff is big. I only now you from what you write here, but I am with you in spirit. .-= Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass)´s last blog ..Someone Elses Words Wednesday- Because sometimes lyrics are so true =-.

By: PirateWench

PirateWench — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 23:38:44 +0000

The measure of a woman is not what is flesh and bone, but what is heart and soul. You Erin have an abundance of both, and on the scale of women who make a difference, you rank very high. The doctors take nothing from your womanhood, they only take away that which would have YOU taken away. I know how hard it is to sit back and long for more, and to know that in many ways, your body has betrayed you. But you are strong and intense, the physical pain will pass, and the years will help dampen the aching. There will be absolutely NO questions left in your mind about womanhood, when you are healthy and watch your children graduate from high school or college, or the first time you hold your future grandchildren. Hang in there Erin – a lot of us are praying for your health and peace of mind <3
.-= PirateWench´s last blog ..Boehner Boehner Boehner -sigh =-.

By: jessica

jessica — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 23:19:08 +0000

you are surrounded by a community that loves you and is here for you. I am part of that community and please, if you need to vent, I’m always here to listen.

Sending lots of love.

By: francine hardaway

francine hardaway — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 23:13:43 +0000

Oh Erin, it's so important to have your health back; I have seen you on Twitter in emergency rooms for the last three or four years, and that can't be good for anyone in your family, least of all you. A womb does not make a woman. That's a cliche, and perhaps a bill of goods sold by a largely male aristocracy. Being a woman is an entire constellation of attributes, and you sell yourself short to even suspect you will be less of a woman without your uterus. And if you need support, send that @aaronvest my way and I will re-educate him:-) .-= francine hardaway´s last blog ..The End of News =-.

By: Lucretia Pruitt

Lucretia Pruitt — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 22:57:27 +0000

Oh honey… just read this now. I’m so sorry. I do get it. It’s weird how we associate ourselves with that small lump of flesh that tortures us from menarche on.

Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s not a hard transition. Imagine what a man would go through if you told him he just needed ‘routine surgery to remove his testicles.’ Then laugh and remember that this, too, is part of being a strong woman – finding your place in the universe when it changes.

((hug))
.-= Lucretia Pruitt´s last blog ..You’re Doing It Right – vol 2 =-.

By: Crunchy

Crunchy — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 04:21:46 +0000

First- am very sorry. When a friend had a hysterectomy she gifted us with her left over sanitary napkins decorated with ribbons. Felt that was the right attitude. Sorry again

By: Rita Arens

Rita Arens — Sun, 25 Jul 2010 16:04:34 +0000

I wish you didn’t have to lose half your organs in one summer. You’ve been through so much this just seems to add insult to injury. I understand your mourning your womb doesn’t take anything away from your love for Hala and Jack.

I never felt the same way about pregnancy that you describe — your description is beautiful and interesting to me. As someone who has a roving mind and a constant desire for change, I understand where you are coming from. I am constantly refocusing my laser beam drill sergeant of a head to keep it from turning on me and asking me not to eat again. I think you have a lot of higher purposes, and only one of them is as mother. The world needs a lot from you, Erin. You’ll find your new project.
.-= Rita Arens´s last blog ..I Knew It Had to Come in Handy Sometime =-.