A walk down memory lane…all in one sobbing phone call

A good friend of mine had a baby this week! And last night I got one of those sobbing, new mother calls.
Remember those?
How could she tell the baby was eating enough? Why did her boobs KILL? Why were they so hard?? How does she get the milk out? Was that her milk?
It was adorable.
And it was all I could do to calm her down, talk her through her engorgement (as I figured out through the sobs) and then, not giggle.
Welcome to the club, girl.
Those first few days home from the hospital, which seem soooooooooo long ago, were a big steaming pile of worry, indecision, panic, questions, questions, and more questions…all thrown on top of bleary eyed euphoria.
I’m a little freaked out she called me. Make senses, I’m the mother of TWO, now. I have the toddler and the infant. And both are/were breastfed.
Huh. Suddenly I’m the wise old Mom you call for advice.
That’s crazy.
But by the end of the phone call she was massaging milk out of her breast and going to snatch the newborn from her Dad before someone else panicked and gave her a bottle.
She sounded more confident. She sounded more sure she was doing what she needed to do as a mother. For that moment she felt like it was under control and she knew what to do next.
I didn’t have the heart to tell her she will have 5 million more moments like that over the next few weeks, months, years.
But I did tell her to call anytime.
Fellow clubmembers are always around to help out their newest recruit.


  1. Oh man, I remember those first days oh so well! Yikes!!

    That’s awesome that she had you to call on, and that you were able to make her feel better. That means soooo much to a brand-new mom.

    Yep, we’re the “veterans” now, aren’t we? 😉

  2. I had little help or explanations during my first few days. My anxiety was also compounded by the fact that my daughter was premature, and in the NICU. I was miserable. It’s so cool that you were able to be there for her.

  3. Only 5 million moments like that?
    Oh yeah, that’s right, your kids are still in the teeny tiny stage.

    I figure by now I’ve gone off the meter in terms of those “oh, my God, what do I DO?” moments. And with my older one coming up on (gulp!) 11, I figure there’s even more to come.

    Parenthood really is a reflection of life. As soon as you figure out one set of answers, they change the questions!

  4. Awww! I love those calls! 🙂

  5. Ok but I’m freaking cause my kiddo will be about four when this one is born. FOUR YEARS since a baby… I’ll probably come crying to you via email LOLOL.. I’m a little freaked.. what if I forgot? LOL?

  6. You know for day 3 to day 14 of Will’s life, I cried from 7pm to about 8pm, like clockwork. I never figured it out, but I would start to cry, and look at a clock and sure enough, it was 7pm. Hormones are amazing!

    It sure would be easier if we didn’t have all of the hormonal changes going on while we suddently become responsible for this helpless, teeny-tiny little creature.

  7. Queen, I love your club. You are an awesome and patient friend!

  8. Oh, that is scary to a kidless woman! 😉

  9. Exactly that – if you’re not questioning yourself, then you’re probably doing something wrong. But kudos to you – you must be doing something right if you’re the one they call!

  10. Honey, I plan to be calling you when I have my second. Perhaps with you by my side I can get it to work the second time!

    It is great that your friend had you to call.

  11. Oh, yeah, I remember that “what did I DO this for?” feeling so well. It’s great that she had you to call.

  12. Oh man those first days! Just thinking about it I can tap into the whole vibe and get anxious even now… so beautiful when you first meet your baby…

    I don’t want any more but I sometimes long to relieve if only a few of those first days, scary as they were, to have my kids be little babies, snuggled up close, both exhausted from our different roles in the birth, treading lightly around the fragility of it all…


  13. You are SO sweet! How nice of you to help someone through those first, awkward moments. Granted, I only remember them from when my sisters had their kids … but I imagine my own time is coming (eventually).

  14. I remember those days. The first two weeks with Cordy were a haze of crying endlessly. I felt so unprepared, even though I had read all the books.

    The initiation into the club is pretty rough, but once you get past it the club is pretty damn cool.

    It was great of you to provide that shoulder to lean on for your friend. Not many of my friends have babies yet, but I look forward to providing that same support to one of them someday.

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