A BlogHer Confession…for Monday

See that badge on the left there? The one that proudly proclaims…”I’M GOING TO BLOGHER!” See it??? It’s wrong. It should say “We’re Going to Blogher!”

My husband and children are coming to BlogHer.

The Kaiser has confided in me that even IF Princess Peanut has weaned herself by July…he’s not real sure he can handle the kids for an entire weekend. At least the man is honest.

Goodbye two nights of uninterrupted sleep. Goodbye Sarah, my supposed-to-be roomie. No giggling and girl talk or pillowfights in our lingerie. Goodbye drunken stupor, followed by stumble back to hotel room….wait…that will probably still happen.

Truth be told, the Kaiser has never had the kids for more than maybe 3 hours at a time. He doesn’t put them to bed. He doesn’t really know the ins and outs of their daily routine.

Sure, if push came to shove he could take them all weekend and everyone would survive. But is that how he wants to spend his weekend? Not to mention me being a 5 hour drive away. How many Paxil’s would I have to take if something did happen and I had to rush home (a point the Kaiser made, which freaked me out to no end)?

This is not his fault. And before you start yelling at me about how freaky protective I am of these kids…it’s not my fault either.

It’s what we decided on long ago when it was agreed that he would work and I would stay home. The man leaves here at 845am and gets home around 8pm. That’s the price we pay to live la vida loca here in suburbia.

The Kaiser, in his very sweet way, broke the news to me not too long ago, and I’m still thinking about it.

Are we odd? Should I leave my children more often? Is everyone too dependent on Mom?

I’ve never left my children overnight. Actually, I only left the Count in order to birth the Princess. Sometimes I think that is really weird. Sometimes I think it’s just our circumstances. We don’t have family nearby to take the kids.

I’ve also been breastfeeding for an eternity. Which makes this entire conversation moot (I really think everyone should use the word moot much more often) since I don’t see an end to the Princess’s thirst for breastmilk anytime soon.

So look for me at Blogher. I’ll be the one darting in and out of my hotel room to nurse between sessions. I’ll also be keeping the Kaiser locked in the room with the kids, because if we let him out, all you women will want him to come party with you instead of me. Trust me on this. He’ll be picking on us and rolling his eyes and making really inappropriate jokes.

I have no doubt you will find the Kaiser and Sarah at the bar Friday and/or Saturday night. Promise me you will go ask them “Where’s Erin????” and they will drunkenly laugh and say “Putting the kids to bed!!! Hahahaha!!!”

I’ll eventually kick the Kaiser back up the room, but I’m wondering if I’ll have a baby monitor in my purse…


  1. I have family nearby en masse, willing to take Duncan but I just can’t do it. Don’t want to. I’m 98% certain the first night he’ll spend away from me will be if I ever get enough sleep to make a baby and go to the hospital to deliver it. However, on Wednesday I am doing a crazy 8 hour round trip in the car for a funeral and I am leaving Duncan with his Grandma and his Daddy. Am very nervous, but the kid hates car trips. My point is, I don’t think its weird, and you’ll all have a super time!

  2. Lord woman, you need a frickin’ break! They will all live without you, Kaiser will survive with only 3 or 4 permanent scars, and YOU WILL BE FINE! Eccentric Father watches the kids all the time, almost more than me at this point. Ok, so they wear the same clothes they had on yesterday, then wore to bed, AGAIN. So they eat dry froot loops in front of the tv for breakfast. So their teeth don’t get brushed twice a day. They love him better than me anyways. Yes, for the love of god, go without the kids and hubby! That being said, have a good time at Blogher. With your family in tow, cause I know that’s what you’re gonna end up doing! Cut the cord, queen, cut the cord.

  3. You’ll still have a spectacular time, even with your family in tow. Heck, BlogHer’s got to be more understanding about breastfeeding than Fred Meyer, right?

    On another note, I had no idea that your name was Erin, too.

  4. I’ve never been away from my kids (except to deliver the little guy), either. It’s not weird at all. 🙂

  5. See, Aaron and I have been away from Cordy three times. She was with grandma the entire time. And I’ve had several times where Aaron has hung out with Cordy for the afternoon so I could have a break.

    But knowing that the Kaiser is coming to Blogher really makes me wish my Aaron could come along. I have this feeling that they would get along really well. Either that or the very fabric of reality would rip open, since the two of them are clearly clones.

  6. I could never leave Hatchling with L. Not that he wouldn’t do a good job, he just wouldn’t be comfortable with that job.

    We’re mommies, it’s what we do. Take the kids and good luck to the Kaiser keeping them entertained in the hotel room! =)

  7. Nah, you are not odd. My now 9-month-old son, Lochlan, has only been with me or my husband (when I go to teach night classes at a local university). My mother took care of Lochlan once so I could go to a movie with friends but of course I was anxiously thinking about him during the whole movie! =P

    Oh, recently, I had to drop Lochlan off at a friend’s house so I could teach because my husband was too sick to take care of him. He did okay the first two hours but the last two, he cried and cried, poor thing. =( Nights are hardest for him.

    Lochlan still nurses full time and shows no interest in solid foods yet. I nurse him to sleep (and all night, too which is the main reason why he sleeps with us). Occasionally my husband will rock Lochlan to sleep if he’s too full to continue nursing.

    People have offered time and again to baby-sit but they don’t realize how HARD it is for Lochlan to be away from Mommy at night. So overnights with other people are out of the question until he is fully weaned, which probably won’t be for another few years. =P

    Have fun with your family at Blogher! I wish I could go but it’s too far away for me (I’m in the Northeast area of the US). =D

  8. P.S. Even with a future second kid, Lochlan will not be away from me because I gave birth at home and will do so again, with Lochlan watching if he wants to. 😉

  9. I think you are crazy. But I thought you were crazy LONG before you had kids.

    My new fear is that I will ditch all the BlogHer events to sit in your room with The Kaiser playing Drinking War and getting in trouble for not watching your kids.

  10. I do have both families nearby enough to take Sweet Pea overnight or for the weekend, but have never done so. She has never even been to either grandparents’ house without me and Slipshod. I have had many many comments from working friends who don’t have the same kind of bond I have with Sweet Pea that sound very much like Tired Tunia’s, and they get my back up and make me feel even more protective. Nobody but you and the Kaiser (but mostly you, since you’re the one there all the time) knows what is best for your family, so “cut the cord” advice from people who don’t know you or live with you is simply their pushing of their way to do things.

    Ditto for me on KeriO’s P.S., assuming the homebirth works out next month (last time I did have to transfer to the hospital after three days of labor due to nonprogression past 3cm). Sweet Pea’s paternal grandma will be in charge of her while I’m in labor, and if she wants to leave and go out for a walk or to Grandma’s house that will be fine, but I hope she will be home to see her baby sister born.

  11. My 3 yr old is currently 3 hours up north with his 2 yr old cousin and my inlaws (we live with said inlaws). I’ve flipped from being deliriously happy that I will only have the 1yr old for a week and feeling like a horrible mom for being so damn happy about. I would never leave my kids with my parents, they would come home paranoid delusional like my mom or pranking me all the time like my dad. I left them with a coworker’s daughter once to see U2 in concert and I called about a dozen times to make sure all was ok. Then again, I called to make sure things were fine when I worked a 4 hour shift a half mile from home. It’s a mom thing, it’s all good. .

    You’ll have fun, I know you will. Someday I hope to have a mommyblogging buddy that will want to go with me to BlogHer. I’m too shy in real life to do it alone. Take lots of photos!! And have a drink for me.

  12. Don’t feel bad! It took me 11 months and 26 days before I left my son overnight with his grandparents. And we were gone for 5 days. I nearly had a heart attack, a stroke and several panic attacks every day I was gone. I even felt like THE worst mother ever for going on a mini vaca with Hubby. He finally told me to snap out of it and I enjoyed the last day…only because we were going home…to see…the Bug. 😛

  13. I haven’t left my kiddo overnight, either. Granted, she’s only 5 months, but I have no intentions of leaving her anytime soon, except for a 3-day stint The Hubby and I are taking to Vegas.

    I like being relied on and I don’t want that to change. Have a good time at BlogHer! Get drunk and stumble back to the room, knowing that Kaiser has the kids, even if he has no clue what he’s doing with them!

  14. Tat’s great news that we’ll get to meet each other! WOO HOO! Hey, and about the kids – you do what works for your family – you’re no weirder than the rest of the world hunny!

  15. That’s* Typing faster than fingers can handle here…

  16. I’ve left the hubby twice with the kids alone for extended weekends. Of course, he plays dumb, but they all survived. The second time, though, was an emergency trip home to be with my hospitalized mother so the entire neighborhood came to his rescue in shifts of taking the kids and making dinner for him. He batted his long lashes and sucked up to all those helpful women when he was entirely capable of doing it himself.
    I am leaving him alone again with the four rugrats in a few short weeks, while I fly to D.C. to find us a place to live. You can bet I’ll hear all sorts of lonely/helpless stories while I’m gone. He is such a faker!
    Well, I’m sure your weekend won’t be ruined. It still sounds like a blast!

  17. I can’t believe he (the Kaiser) hasn’t weighed in on this yet.

    He must be busy. Or something.

    And I’d just like to clarify…I realize we created this situation. And I’m not really complaining. It’s a temporary situation. I just wonder sometimes if I’m the only one. And clearly, I’m not.

  18. I have a wedding in September that I have to leave the island for and I am debating on wether or not to leave my son. I rarely leave him since my husband and I made a similar arrangement and we have no family in town. I was using the breastfeeding as an excuse to take him, but now he has gone and weaned himself! I think that this is a fairly common dilema until kids are school age.
    Don’t feel weird! You get to go to Blogher! Yay!

  19. Anonymous says:

    I agreed that I would stay home with our daughters but I need a break every now and then. My husband does most of the bathing and putting to sleep on the weekends so he knows all about their nightly routine. Your blog sure made me thankful for my husband…he has no problem w/taking over if I have to get out for a little.
    We also have no family nearby…we haven’t left the girls for more than 3 hours.

  20. I certainly understand your situation with your husband working long hours. However, I find it a bit sad that he’s not willing to take on this adventure so you can have some “you” time.

    My fear is that as the kids age they won’t see your husband as a real parent and will always look to you for guidance.

    Or I could just be full of crap.

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