Mother’s Day is a Scam!

Mother’s Day for this Queen will always suck donkey balls. The end.


It’s Mother’s Day at Count Waffle’s little preschool and he’s home on the couch with a 103 degree fever. He’s sad because it was “our” day. I’m sad because it was “my” mother’s day and Princess Peanut is THRILLED because she no longer has said fever and is currently jumping off the living room couch and giggling.

Mother’s Day and I have a really shitty track record. There have been no brunches at fancy hotels or macaroni necklaces. There has been ONE champagne morning with a jewelery filled breakfast, but that was a make-up Sunday designed to balance the first year, which we shall never speak of again.

Then there was the last year where I got over zealous in my reminders of the pending day and forever established the “holiday” as a husband free zone.

So to have my ONE event this year taken from me by fever…makes me want to go beat up God. Or Buddha. Or the deity of your choice.

Fuck Mother’s Day. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Tell me how its really some trumped up Halmark holiday and I shouldn’t care. I’m starting a new trend where we hip Moms think Mother’s Day is some anti-woman, oppressive tradition where it makes females less empowered. Or something.

Ok, I’m going to go repeat that all to myself 300 times until I believe it while I go wipe tears.


  1. Happy Erin Day. Screw mother’s day, because I agree, mine have all been shitty, too. My husband always works that day and I hate that.

    And I never get fancy brunches or anything.

    So I think we should have a day in honor of us just being able to survive these stupid holidays.

    Wanna go to a fancy brunch and drink wine until we puke? How fast can you get here?

  2. Even with it being some trumped up card day, you deserve the day to be special. You do so much for your family, you should be honored. If birthdays and father’s day are official bj days than why can’t this one Sunday in May be the day to shower you with affection (and lots of pretty gifts). I hope you have a spectacular Mother’s Day!

  3. Queen of Spain says:

    Rumor has it some of you are having trouble commenting…

    I’m looking into it!!

  4. That does royally suck. And you do deserve some extra special treatment, whether it be gifts or something else. Just because you were over-zealous one year is no excuse – it was your way making sure you weren’t forgotten.

    Knowing my luck, I’ll have this baby on Mother’s Day. What kind of a day off is that?

  5. Every day is special for her. That’s why she calls herself the Queen. For example, just last night on 3 seperate occasions she pulled this:

    “I’m kinda hungry. I want a snack. Something salty would good.” And then sighed.

    She was, of course, just expecting me to jump up and deliver to her whatever her heart desired. And you know what? I do almost every. single. time.

    Mother’s Day for Erin should be the one day of the year that she’s not waited on hand and foot.

  6. I really hope that the Kaiser is just about as good at being funny as Prince Charming, ’cause if that above comment wasn’t a REALLY bad joke, then someone needs to hit him over the head with a frying pan 🙂

    Run Kaiser…Run

    I sorry Erin 🙁 This year Mom’s day is a bust for me as well. Prince Charming has to work so I’m left to care after my 3 demons lovlies myself.

  7. Queen of Spain says:

    Frying pan. Yes. Will do.

  8. My prince asked me tonight what I wanted for mother’s day….what do you tell a 7 year old?? Flowers?? Chocolates??? How about a tacky necklace that he put his heart and soul into? Then he asked me who my favorite singer was….I think that daddy is fishing for ideas through our prince…what do you think??

    Oh…and my first Mother’s day was a bust too….just so that you know that you aren’t alone.

  9. I dislike mother’s day. Now that my kids are older, maybe some good will come of it but it does not have a good track record for me.

  10. My husband is going to guest post on Mother’s Day!

  11. On my very first Mother’s Day we all went out for breakfast and my brother in law went into this diatrabe (sp?) about why should mothers get a special day? They don’t NEED a special day. I sat there crying next to him because he knew how important this day was to me, how I longed to be a mother. It stings to this day to think about it but now that he’s a father, I wonder how he feels about Father’s Day? I bet he would be hurt if no one acknowledged it. I feel your pain dear Queen.

    Did you want to borrow my huge cast iron skillet or will any frying pan work?

  12. Sorry to hear that.
    I hate Mother’s Day too.

    I hope he feels better soon.

  13. Kaiser! My gosh! I’m utterly suprised at your comment.

    Okay, no not really, but seriously, just make the woman happy. She’s a mother. We get very emotional when our designated day isn’t fabulous.

    And she had tears! Doesn’t that just break your heart? Even a little?

  14. I use to think Mother’s day was a waste and could never get why my mom needed kudos one day a year, did she think we did not love her the other 364 days? Now that I’m a mother and the not so proud owner of exactly 4 really disappointing Mother’s Days I think I’ll join your team!

  15. I agree. Mother’s Day Sucks. My husband left us and now has a new family. My kids never remember my birthday or Mother’s Day. They only think of themselves. What can I buy them…what next…a new cell phone, a new iPod…what what what? I adopted these three kids with a whole heart to love and raise them and I was left alone. They, of course, still love their dad, despite the fact that he never sees them, does anything for them. But for me, it’s complain, complain, complain. I am so sad this Mother’s Day. First of all I did not give birth to them. Yes, I am their mother, ungratefully so. I don’t feel like a mother, I feel like a frickn slave. I don’t take a thing for myself because I feel guilty. Yes, it’s so off kilter. I am the one who is here 24 hours a day… and I feel guilty? Their dad feels no guilt. NOT any. So why do I? Why do I hate Mother’s Day? I want it to just go away.

  16. Marybeth says:

    I’m so sorry. ugh! Last Mothers Day weekend my hubby and I had a blow up in a parking lot (we are so classy). I told him to fuck off and stomped back into the store. A man offered to marry me if I ever wanted to dump my husband. He then jumped into a very expensive car and drove off. I told my husband and for some reason he was then very very nice to me for the rest of the day. ha ha

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