I Checked ‘Wife’

My daughter wants to know when boys marry boys and girls marry girls if everyone gets to wear a pretty white dress.


This is her big question tonight as I put her to bed and she nestles her chin into my neck. Clearly she’s been mulling this over in her five-year old brain and it needs an answer.

I explain that everyone can wear whatever they want…and you don’t need a white dress for a wedding. She nods her head and then proclaims that she’ll be wearing a white dress to her wedding, and she thinks she wants to marry a boy, but maybe she’ll marry a girl.

So long as you love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together, that sounds wonderful.

And then my son chimes in that he’s probably never going to get married. And he’s going to get a ‘house on wheels’ and live next door to me…so we can always cuddle.

So long as you are happy and this is what you want.

As you fill out your Census forum, know that “the Census Bureau says same-sex couples in any state who consider themselves spouses should feel free to check the ‘husband’ or ‘wife’ boxes on the census form, rather than ‘unmarried partner.'”

However you define your relationship, here’s hoping you can check the box you choose, wear the dress you want, or live next to your Mom in a house on wheels.


  1. Amen. Well said.
    .-= Undomestic Diva´s last blog ..Yo’ momma. Blogga. =-.

  2. newfiehun says:

    My son, at 6 years old, came home from school one day and cheerfully asked, “Guess what happens when a boy marries a boy? Sooooomeone has to wear the GIRL clothes!!” That was the end of it. If only it were as simple as a wardrobe issue for the rest of the world.
    .-= newfiehun´s last blog ..Keelhauled =-.

  3. Excellent. Really excellent. Brava!

  4. This was lovely. But then again, I expect nothing less from the house of Spaniards.

    You know, unless we’re talking about spanking. 🙂

  5. I checked “my wife filled it out for me when I was at work and the results were in a sealed envelope when I got home.”
    .-= Louis Gray´s last blog ..Google Buzz to Users: Do You Know What You’re Doing? =-.

  6. Beautiful story, thanks for sharing!

    @newfiehun : Cute. Maybe someday it will be that simple for everyone.

    @LouisGray: LOL!

  7. Lisa L. Seifert says:

    GREAT post! Also? That robot shirt on your forever neighbor is AWESOME!

  8. I really want that robot t-shirt in my size.

  9. Awww. Heartwarming. Great post.
    .-= Al_Pal´s last blog ..Sensitivity: I have it. =-.

  10. Right on!

    Oh, and your son’s life plan is cute!
    .-= Brittney´s last blog ..Silence is Golden =-.

  11. Beautifully put. If only everybody understood this.


  12. As she is the one who works and the one who pays the bills, my partner also filled out the census report (not that there is a direct corrolation between these tasks) and I believe that I was marked as Husband, not that I would be terribly disappointed if I had been marked as a wife. We are happy in our family and only wish we had a house on wheels so that we could live at the beach every once in a while.
    .-= Nathan Eckenrode´s last blog ..Well-trained or something =-.

  13. Erin, this is my favorite of your posts ever.

  14. this gets more and more beautiful with each time i reread this post. well said.
    .-= nic @mybottlesup´s last blog ..well this sucks =-.

  15. I love that you were so matter-of-fact about it. It really is a decision between people who love one another, and shouldn’t matter to anyone else.

    By the way, my daughter is going to live with me for the rest of her life, and have cats.

    And my son? He is going to be a farmer, and live here on weekends.

    Aren’t I lucky?
    .-= Tina@Send Chocolate Now´s last blog ..I felt the earth move =-.

  16. I have happy chills. I love the innocence of what some grown ups are always bickering about.

    Whatever makes you happy. 🙂

  17. Editdebs says:

    Lovely. Cheered up my evening. Thanks!

  18. You are raising two of the coolest and most open-minded kids ever. It’s inspiring! Also, if I ever get divorced I want to live in an RV next door to you too.

  19. If only it were so right now. The waiting is the hardest part.
    .-= Pop and Ice´s last blog ..I’m Flaky =-.

  20. That is all I wish for Ian, happiness and love.

  21. My son says he’s just going to move into the pop-up camper we have. He’s saving money already!
    .-= patois´s last blog ..Wordy Wednesday #101 =-.

  22. (I tried to submit a comment earlier and revieved an error message. If this is a duplicate comment please don’t think I’m crazy!)

    Fabulous story! Just excellent! This is my first visit to your blog. It’s so nice to meet you!

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