Soldiering on. That’s what my kids are doing here.
They decided, a good few blocks from home, they wanted to build an amazing fort with these discarded palms. I told them they could do whatever they wanted with them provided they carried them home. Not me.
So they trudged. And toiled. And grunted.
And eventually they turned the corner to home.
Elated they threw the palms in our yard and fist-bumped.
Then you know what they did? They quickly and totally forgot all about the fort and sat down to discuss, at great length, how hard they worked to get home.
There are always those that say it’s not the destination, but the journey. I’m starting to understand it a bit better.
My Lupus has flared again. My liver is under attack and infected, enough to where we have to cancel birthday plans and pick up new meds and have me rest. And I’m realizing this roller coaster…this healthy, sick, semi-healthy, semi-sick thing is my life. It will be my life for good now, and I need to stop worrying so much about the destination.
I need to focus on enjoying the journey.
So for my birthday wish, I’d like to be more like my kids. Carefree, excited, and enjoying every part of the journey, even if it’s hard work.
Update December 11, 2010:
What a wonderful, slice of life with a lesson tossed in on the side.
Lupus can go #suckit for flaring up on your birthday and keeping you down, but I am confident, it will NEVER knock you out.
xo
M
.-= Marla´s last blog ..Life After Kids w- Devin Mills 112010 =-.
I am a firm believer in birthday redos. As in, if you can’t properly celebrate your birthday on the day you should just get another celebration at a more convenient time. Like for instance, last year I spent my birthday at a funeral, which wasn’t exactly according to my original plan. So I declared my birthday to be officially rescheduled for a more appropriate day.
Perhaps I should inform Aaron of this birthday rescheduling philosophy . . .
Anyway MY Christmas wish is that you have no flareups in 2011.
.-= Jaelithe´s last blog ..So That Happened =-.
Wow. Amazing how you’re putting things in perspective. Focusing on life’s small blessings and the journey itself – sounds like the only good way to keep your sanity in this insanely difficult situation. Keep smiling 😉
.-= Joanna Ciolek´s last blog ..Holiday Giveaway- Free SEO Website Review =-.
Can I possible love you any more?! I mean really and truly. There’s not another woman in the world I admire more than you for your strength. I’m for serious. Not just because it’s your birthday. ;D
P.S. Be excited for your damn belated birthday present (to be delivered 12/31/10 on the safety of the ground somewheres in California). It rhymes with mantique municorn mbell.
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Kids and dogs, man. Goldie teaches me that kind of thing too. What she’s into, she’s REALLY into – no past, no future, just digging or doing what she’s doing that’s so important…
.-= Suebob´s last blog ..It is ALIVE =-.
Great post. & Birthday do-overs are totally valid. 😉
Be here now. ;p
You’re breaking my heart with this, but you are just amazing. Instead of being totally focused on your self, you can see the small graces that surround you. Your family is lucky to have you, and I think they know it.
Lovely.
.-= Amanda´s last blog ..Wonder =-.
Happy Birthday! I hope your antibotics knock the sucker out!
Happy Birthday.
And as someone who lives with Lupus, I know it sounds trite, but the healthy eventually becomes than the sick. I hope you get there soon.
Hugs, and happy birthday.
From what I’ve read so far on this blog, your wish has already come true.
From what I’ve read so far on this blog, your wish has already come true.