On Mothers and Sons

My son gave me a ring for Christmas. A beautiful, school-gift-shop bought, pink-stoned, heart-shaped ring. Being the nosey mother I am I poked and prodded him to find out why he chose this ring, and why a ring and not, say, a coffee mug or frame or any one of the other gifts they sell at these types of affairs.

Best lazy Sunday ever

The pink stone and heart were easily explained. This was the only ring with pink – and he knows I love pink. As for the heart, well he said, ‘Mom, I love you, geez.’

Makes perfect sense.

Now…why a ring?

This is where things got more complicated.

I wanted to give you something like Dad gives you that you never take off.
Because of my wedding rings, you mean?
I wanted to give you ones like Dad does, so you wear it…always.
There are lots of things I wear all the time honey.
Yes, but only the ones that you love the best you leave on. You never take off the diamonds. So I had to give you one just as good as Daddy’s.
Sweetie I would love to wear anything you give me all the time, rings or hats or anything!
But if you got a ring, from me a boy, you have to wear it forever.

I hugged him, tears in my eyes. In so many ways he wants to be his father, but this is a way that never really occurred to me.

Dad gets Mom forever. All the time. Dad doesn’t even get sent to a different bed to sleep.

Now here is maybe where you are questioning how ‘tough’ I’m making this child or what a ‘Mamma’s boy’ I’m turning him into … but understand this: his soul loves purely and without bias. He does the same for his sister. That same night, as I left his bed, he pulled his sissy close to hug and snuggle her at bedtime. He quietly told her ‘It’s ok Hala, you don’t have to be afraid of the dark…I’m here.’

And you know what, he was JUST as thoughtful as he gave his baby sister her gift. Something just as special, and just as well planned. He gave her a sushi pillow (stuffed, adorable) because she LOVES sushi and he wanted her to have something to snuggle in bed in case he wasn’t there.

He takes good care of the women he loves, just like his father.

So now I sit here fondling this ring he gave me in my fingers. I’ve asked him if it was ok I move it from my finger (I have really sensitive skin and this $3 ring is going to get a bit green) and onto a chain close to my heart (his Dad’s idea). He loved this thought and smiled broadly as his Nana and I worked to place it carefully on my best silver chain.

From time to time today he’s come over to the couch to show me a toy, ask me to help him read a word, or fix his shirt, etc.. and each time he too fondles the ring around my neck.


It’s there.


And now I feel it’s my goal to make sure he knows that just like his father, his tokens of love will be with me forever.


  1. As a mama to two boys who love deeply and without end. I love this.

    Merry Christmas!
    .-= Brenna´s last blog ..Merry Christmas- Peace on Earth- Love and Kindness For All… =-.

  2. My son is 3.5 and he’s already loving and protective. He takes care of his little sister like his life depends on it and loves me unconditionally. He asks me if I’ll still be able to hold him and hug him when he’s big like Daddy b/c even though Daddy hugs me all the time, I can’t hold him. 🙂

    Boys and their love melt my heart. It’s so nice to hear from another mom who nurtures that love in her son and appreciates it and doesn’t try to “toughen” it. Your son sounds like a wonderful person. Good for you.
    .-= Laura´s last blog ..Merry Christmas…the photo version =-.

  3. Oh my….{{{tears streaming down my face}}}}…how I miss those days when my baby men were boys and thought I was all that and more.

    As my two sons approached puberty and beyond, those moments were fleeting at best and now my babymen have “replaced” me with objets d’amour closer to their own age and I am just the voice on the other end of the phone…when they remember to call. My circumstance is colored by an ex- whose own disdain and lack of respect for his mother was unfortunately passed on to my sons…but I keep praying one day they will wake up and remember these unforgettable moments, and I can hold them once again.

    Despite your challenges, you are so blessed with a husband who is beyond amazing in so many ways….and of course, your son is proving beyond a shadow of a doubt that he is truly learning how to be a real man like his dad.
    .-= Marla´s last blog ..Life After Kids w- Devin Mills 112010 =-.

  4. Lovely. What a sweet boy. As the mom of a son, this really touched my heart.

  5. I remember a friend jokingly telling me early on “it’s a shame you aren’t in love with your baby…”
    It engendered a conversation about the thought that anyone could *not* be so madly in love with their children.
    I love that you are in the same camp, my friend.

    And your boy? He’s just as awesome as his Mama, Dad, & Sissy. You are an amazing family.

  6. Wow! That’s such a beautiful story. I think it’s evident that you’ve been able to demonstrate to him just how important family is.

  7. You’re raising a loving and sensitive young man.
    .-= Daisy´s last blog ..Holiday Mess! =-.

  8. Love this! Men who can be tender, nurturing, and good caretakers are a treasure. And they start out as thoughtful, loving boys. 🙂

    I find phrases like “mama’s boy” and “boys will be boys” really unhelpful attempts to police masculinity or excuse an unhealthy version of it. This is my “Nerdy Apple Bottom” moment, where I push back against women, men, and other boys who say it’s not “manly” to cherish, support, and express love through caretaking for the females in your life. Of course it is. What a great big bro and wonderful son he is. And I hope more of us make it okay, in ever-widening circles of okayness, for more and more boys and men to be tender and loving.

    So thanks for being an awesome mama, and for this post. 🙂
    .-= Cynematic´s last blog ..Burning with excitement on Christmas Eve fb =-.

  9. Erin –

    When I bless the world with offspring, am I allowed to come to you for advice? Because if my kids turn out to be half as kind hearted, intelligent, and thoughtful as yours – I will be a lucky, lucky father.

  10. Very sweet post, Erin and a good reminder to call Mom.

    And, I remember years ago finding my “jewelry” that I made her in nursery school. I’m pretty sure she still has the melted pill bottles with beads. Very 70’s.
    .-= Jeremy Pepper´s last blog ..Placeholder – Yep- a placeholder =-.

  11. What a sweet son you are raising! Little boys sure know how to melt their mama’s hearts.
    .-= Sarah´s last blog ..Christmas in Pictures =-.

  12. Awwww. So much sweetness. Bless.

  13. My youngest is going through a mommy phase right now-you’re my mommy, only my mommy (note, I’m not, he has a brother) but he needs this love and reassurance, and I happily give it to him because too soon he’ll grow up and not need this hourly reminder. You guys are so sweet!

  14. Globe trottin' mama says:

    Well, that’s just the sweetest thing I’ve read all day!

  15. What an amazing person you’re raising.

  16. He’s so precious. I have three little boys, and gosh, I wish they remain this sweet, innocent and pure forever. Doesn’t it just melt your heart?
    .-= Joanna Ciolek´s last blog ..5 Steps to Easy &amp Effective Keyword Research =-.

  17. Be still my heart!

    I so want to pre-arrange marriage to your beautiful son with my daughter! I think they would be a gorgeous couple! Whoever your son marries will be truly blessed by a good heart.

  18. BEYOND sweet. To me (the step-mom of a boy) there is nothing Mama’s boy about this. It is pure utter love. And thank God he is expressing his feelings of love for ‘his’ women. I have just gotten here with my step-son and it is beyond beautiful how love develops (well I know he would never admit to loving me, but I know he does).

    I have super sensitive skin too. Maybe have the stone taken out and have the metal part dipped in white or yellow gold so it lasts forever. they can put the pretty pink stone back in after. I think it would cost about $100. Well, that is what I would do =)

  19. This makes me want to cry. I love having boys and reading posts like this makes me so curious to see what they will grow up to be. I want a pic of the ring!!
    .-= Mothers’ Hideaway´s last blog ..Change your clothes! =-.


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