Make Me

There is a tremendous amount of talk about how women balance work, children…life.

I tend to give the same answer every time I am asked “How do you balance everything?”

I don’t.

But I am learning. Part of that learning has been the revelation that I need to take control. I need to take control of my emotions as I travel for business and miss my children. I need to take control of my household when I plan for summer camps, babysitters, and appointments, and I need to take control of how it all goes down.

That means thinking outside the box, saying NO more than usual, and finding ways to make it work.

Trust me, sometimes it feels really good to say no, and it feels really good to find solutions.

Next week I’m packing up my minivan and taking the kids to work WITH ME in Northern California. I’ve hired a sitter remotely (thanks VDog), I’ve mapped out nearby parks, and I’ll be using my hands-free headset to take conference calls on the road.

Sometimes we Moms just do what we gotta. And I’m tired of feeling guilty, feeling like it’s nothing but chaos around here, and just getting by while the laundry piles up, the permissions slips forgotten, or the kids sigh or even cry as they get the short end of the stick while Mom and Dad work their asses off.

Time to take control, and take charge of this chaos. I’m done compromising. First a business trip with kids in tow, and then we’re headed to Michigan where family will help for the summer.

And the next time you ask me how I balance it all…I’m going to give a different answer.


  1. You don’t happen to have room in that minivan for three raucous (but oh so sweet! VERY SWEET! Albeit, foul-mouthed…) little boys do you? Pretty please?

  2. You’ll be so close! Perhaps a day trip to MI is in order…right after I get my kids some passports. Frig.

    I have a hard time balancing too.

  3. Oh Northern California. *cough* I’m in Northern California *cough cough*

    Just sayin.

  4. Sometimes I think there’s no such thing as balance in motherhood. There’s just too much for one person to manage, so something’s gotta give. But re-jigging is always a good idea. Good luck with yours. πŸ™‚

  5. When you find an answer, clue me in, because I don’t do half what you appear to do, and I struggle each and every day.

  6. You rock lady! And if your in need of a play date while in the Bay Area my son & daughter are the same ages as yours and VERY well versed in Star Wars. πŸ™‚

  7. Obviously I agree with you. No shocker.

  8. BTW, How do I stop being a blue spruce with odd hair? I’ve been meaning to ask about that. I’d rather have an avatar. How do I obtain it?

  9. All the very best to you in your quest for the organized life and wishing you a grand trip to Northern California.

  10. Devra I did it and then forgot how…I totally need to um…try. Click that avatar now and see what happens

  11. It takes me to my own site. I may be a tree for a long time.

  12. Great post. This is my first time checking out your blog. Someone left a link to you on my “Bloggers I Admire” ( so here I am seeing why πŸ™‚

    It is so hard to balance it all. I now homeschool my two boys and with running a company from home, it is not easy. Sometimes they complain that I work most mornings and I have to remind them that if they were in school, I could work all day in peace πŸ™‚

    Good luck managing the road trip. You are a braver woman than I am. I look forward to reading about how it goes.


  13. Thank you so much for this post. It’s really inspiring actually. Sometimes I feel like I’m the only mom with laundry piling up and kids crying cuz they’re getting the short end of the stick. We work hard to do something to support our families and still be the moms we want and need to be. So here’s to balance… *cheers*

  14. This is so true! If you are balancing everything it really could topple over at any moment. I totally screw it up sometimes, but I just do the best I can to get it all done and freak out as infrequently as possible.

  15. GOOD FOR YOU!!!!! I’m always happy to hear about people taking charge of their situations and put family ahead of work every now and again. It’s like saying, “I have sacrificed for you and compromised my family time. It’s time for you to bend for me!”
    It’s so empowering! I hope you have fun with the kids and things don’t get too hectic.

  16. Hi! I’m new to your blog. I looked up your blog after seeing some of my twitter friends tweet your name.. hehe I wanted to know what all the fuss about the Queen of Spain was about.

    I loved this post. I’m married with 2 children, in my 20’s and I travel for work. I have learned after having to take a 9 day international business trip that the only way we’re going to make this work is to control my emotions, and try to balance it out as best as I possibly can. It’s not easy but I feel at peace after I let go of the importance of what others think about my decisions.


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