To all the men I’ve beaten down before

There is nothing like a snarky woman in your fantasy football league to spice things up.

Try three. The girls and I are officially part of the Blog Pound League some Daddybloggers and Draft Day Suit bloggers put together. And while Sarah and Gidge really know their football, my NFL knowledge is above par, yet still lacking. So I am resorting to Guerrilla Warfare.

The boys have already started talking smack. And if there is one thing I do really well (hey, hey…out of the gutter there boys-but you’d be right on that too) it’s speak to grown men like they are helpless children. I’ll start with the usual verbal assaults, but don’t think I’m above a long monologue about my period and tampons just to make you weep and beg for mercy.

You boys know that women never play fair. So expect me to cheat and catfight my way to the pot of gold in this league. I’ll have you quitting because your WIFE won’t let you play with that bitch anymore. Is that PORN on your computer again? Did it really come from that GIRL in your fantasy league??? Oh yeah, I will stoop that low.

So I figure with the boys out of the way, my only real competition is the gals. Sarah will put too many Bucs players on her team to be a real threat. I’m hoping Gidge gets overwhelmed with the whole “has a job� thing and misses some key transactions.

That just leaves me. And my ample breasts. Which I will use and abuse in order to win money. And fame. And glory.

Oh, and Sarah…I totally blame you for my new obsession with fantasy football. You’ve created a monster.