#suckit

Girls

October 26, 2008 by Queen of Spain 29 Comments

It all started innocently enough…I was plucking my eyebrows in my bathroom mirror. My 3-year old wandered in, stared at me, then stared at her own reflection.

Mommy what are you doing?

But why would you do that?

It was then my heart sank and I chose my words very carefully. She was watching me too closely, looking at herself too closely, and I could see her 3-year old brain trying to decide if her eyebrows were subpar-in need of that thing Mommy was doing.

The very idea that my daughter would find any part of her body, any tiny portion of her little face anything but perfect, sent a wave of nausea over me.

It was only a few days earlier she came home from preschool crying because another girl didn’t like her new haircut. Of course it was quickly forgotten and the two girls are paling around as if nothing tearful had been exchanged.

It has begun and she is only 3.

I don’t know how to stop it.

Of course her father and I always talk about her wit and brains, and attempt to build up her esteem in every way possible. We try not to focus on how ‘pretty’ she looks in her princess dress, but do make a point of letting her know she’s beautiful. She’s beautiful playing dress up and she’s beautiful playing in the mud.

We try and focus on her being perfect just the way she is…

…then come nights like tonight, when my daughter wants me to paint her toe-nails pink. Not because of any other reason than she wants them painted. She would prefer blue, or purple but all I had was pink in the house. A pink I bought a long time ago then put away.

But tonight it was about fun. Harmless girl fun. We giggled as I painted her toes and she was giddy to have it happen. And I wonder if with that simple act, coupled with watching mom pluck her eyebrows, put on her makeup, primp…if I just added to her already doomed body image path.

I hate this. I hate that I’m worried about this. I hate that political headlines involve clothing and makeup (dude, next time Sarah…try Target) but it’s impossible to avoid.

I can’t avoid it at 33 and my daughter can’t avoid it at 3.

I don’t know how to stop it.

Filed Under: #suckit, Feeling YaYa, Obama '08

Proposition 8 Supporters Can #SuckIt

October 18, 2008 by Queen of Spain 286 Comments

I’m really tired of dancing around this and trying to be nice.

I’ve seen your really cute church ads. I’ve heard you talk about how, in your whacky world of crazy, letting a gay couple marry would somehow infringe on your religious rights. How you’re doing it for the protection of ‘our children’ and how it’s really not about tolerance of ‘lifestyles’ but how it’s about you being ‘forced’ to accept same-sex unions.

Can I just say…YOU EVIL BASTARDS.

And I mean that with all the love in my heart.

This isn’t about religion or what you believe. This is about civil rights and your bigotry. Yes, your religion has made you a bigot. An evil, hating, horrible, bigot.

If you would like your children to not hear about anyone different from them, feel free to keep them the hell out of public schools and for that matter, public places. Because we here in the ‘public’ are not all like you and we allow our citizens, ALL OUR CITIZENS, the same rights.

I’m seeing YES ON PROP 8 signs in my neighborhood and I have half a mind to knock on their doors and ask them why they think bigotry is ok. Why they think denying rights to others is ok. Why they think their family is better than any other family. Why, exactly, they have SUCH EVIL IN THEIR HEARTS. And where the FUCK they get off with the smiling happy stick-figure family representing them on those fucked up signs.

If your religion does not allow you to marry someone of the same sex..then don’t. If your religion allows for bigotry, perhaps you should find another religion.

Seriously. I am disgusted. Absolutely disgusted by supporters of Prop 8.

I can see absolutely NO justification for this legislation other than you implementing your evil across California.

As my husband just said, Orthodox Jews can’t work on Saturdays…do we come up with legislation making it illegal for everyone to work on Saturdays?

It’s the same thing. You get that, right?

No. You don’t. Because you’re evil, and you some how think gays being allowed the same rights as you is bad.

Perhaps you need to live somewhere that doesn’t allow rights to all it’s citizens. Somewhere where everyone is just like you and thinks like you and lives like you.

Now, many of you will be very quick to point out the Obama-Biden take on gay marriage. And let us BE CLEAR about that record, shall we? I am not naive enough to think every candidate is perfect, and I am disappointed my candidates won’t go that extra mile for gay marriage. But let’s face it…it’s your fault.

You make up a large electorate and they can’t alienate half the country. I get that. They want to make sure all voices are heard in American, even the evil ones.

It’s WRONG, but I get it. I’m also proud that they’ve supported equal rights for the LGBT community and will not support any constitutional amendments defining marriage.

Now you, on the other hand…what’s your excuse? Your religion says gay is wrong? Your religion also says you should stone wicked kids, but…I digress.

Get your bigotry out of my state. Get it out of my schools and get it out of my country. ALL are welcome, and that means you too, if you can stay and play nice.

Forced toleration can suck sometimes. But hey, I have to tolerate you, so it works both ways.

Oh, and by the way…years from now, when this is looked back upon like the civil rights movement in the 60’s, and people ask you what side you were on…have fun explaining that one.

*updated 10/20/2008
I keep re-reading and re-reading this post because it’s gnawing at me and won’t seem to let me go. Yes, I am angry. I am very angry over this issue, and writing this was cathartic and let me push all my anger onto a blank page. But as the debate and venom continues over same-sex marriage, I’m worried my hitting ‘publish’ did more harm than good. That I just threw out something into the world that spewed just as much hate as the what I perceive to be coming at me from those who support this measure. To be clear, and as I said in comments, I do not believe all religions and all faiths are evil or bigoted. I found more love in some Christian friends and family than can be expressed. I’ve also seen entire Jewish communities condemn this measure and other faiths rally against discrimination and bigotry. But perhaps, what I keep getting as I re-read this…is a microcosm of what’s gotten so out of hand on this issue and in this entire election: we’re all just name calling and screaming at each other. I regret adding to that, I truly do…but it’s so hard when you feel pushed there. Pushed by whatever entities are at work. So I’m letting this post stand because it’s a fair representation of how I felt when I wrote it, it does-if you can get past the venom-convey all the things I find wrong about this measure and why it should be defeated. But it occurs to me that this entire fight…this battle…is over love. Who can love. How they can love. Why they can or can not love. And the last thing it needs is more hate thrown in. So before you add to the hundreds of comments here or continue to scream and yell, please take that into consideration. Love. -ekv

Filed Under: #suckit

Witch Hunt! Witch Hunt!

October 17, 2008 by Queen of Spain 13 Comments

Ok, that does it.

Now I’m really pissed.

According to Congresswoman Michele Backmann, I’m anti-American and so is half of Congress.

Dear Congresswoman McCarthy, I mean Backmann,

Just because we don’t think like you doesn’t make me ANTI-American. I mean, isn’t your current VP candidate the one running around saying there are only a few places in America that are PRO-American. That sounds pretty damn Anti-American to me.

You and your GOP cohorts are really starting to push this ‘otherness’ crap too far and I think you may all need to measured for white hoods soon.

This is MY America too, and you’re lucky in MY America you’ll still have a seat at the table and a voice come Nov. 5th.

Even if it’s evil and stupid.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Geez, and I was doing so good today being all friendly and love thy neighbor. You totally ruined it.

Sincerely,

Erin Kotecki Vest

Filed Under: #suckit

Well This Made Me Smile

October 10, 2008 by Queen of Spain 29 Comments

…and kinda pee my pants with laughter

Filed Under: #suckit, kill me now

Enough is Enough

October 6, 2008 by Queen of Spain 73 Comments

I’m going to write this as calmly and as rationally as I can muster.

Senator John McCain and Governor Sarah Palin, it’s time to take a step back and regain your honor. Perhaps you should consider what your latest political strategy is doing to the American public. Perhaps, if you have any sense of dignity or pride, you should stop and regain a sense of responsibility in the misinformation you are giving to the public and it’s ripple effect on people.

From the Washington Post:

Worse, Palin’s routine attacks on the media have begun to spill into ugliness. In Clearwater, arriving reporters were greeted with shouts and taunts by the crowd of about 3,000. Palin then went on to blame Katie Couric‘s questions for her “less-than-successful interview with kinda mainstream media.” At that, Palin supporters turned on reporters in the press area, waving thunder sticks and shouting abuse. Others hurled obscenities at a camera crew. One Palin supporter shouted a racial epithet at an African American sound man for a network and told him, “Sit down, boy.”

…

The reception had been better in Clearwater, where Palin, speaking to a sea of “Palin Power” and “Sarahcuda” T-shirts, tried to link Obama to the 1960s Weather Underground. “One of his earliest supporters is a man named Bill Ayers,” she said. (“Boooo!” said the crowd.) “And, according to the New York Times, he was a domestic terrorist and part of a group that, quote, ‘launched a campaign of bombings that would target the Pentagon and our U.S. Capitol,’ ” she continued. (“Boooo!” the crowd repeated.)

“Kill him!” proposed one man in the audience.

Palin also told those gathered that Obama doesn’t like American soldiers. “He said that our troops in Afghanistan are just, quote, ‘air-raiding villages and killing civilians,’ ” she said, drawing boos from a crowd that had not been told Obama was actually appealing for more troops in Afghanistan.

This game you’re playing to win…it’s dangerous. In fact, it’s beyond dangerous. Your lies and your smears and your attempt to insight riots and zealots and extremists is irresponsible and disgusting.

I’m not one to talk, but I at the very least have a heart and conscience.

I will hold you accountable for your attempts, your words, and your strategy. I will also continue to write and talk and blog every lie and every smear and every misstep, because I can very clearly see what you are doing and that you will stop at nothing to get there.

For every voter you get to yell racial slurs I will find ten, including my own mother, to knock on doors for Senator Obama.

For every voter you get yelling ‘Kill Him’ at a rally, I will find 50 to blog in support of Senator Obama.

For every voter you inspire to create offensive t-shirts, or buttons, or waffle mix, hang offensive flags or put up disgusting lawn signs, I will find 200 to donate to the Obama campaign.

For every single voter you get to spread your hate, I will find thousands willing to stand up to your evil.

Game over. Enough is enough.

Filed Under: #suckit

Opening Some ‘Weapons Grade’ Hate

October 4, 2008 by Queen of Spain 49 Comments

There’s an article in Time, written by Belinda Luscombe, that has had me swearing for a few hours now.

In her piece “Why Some Women Hate Sarah Palin” she comes to the conclusion Palin is disliked because we’re all catty bitches who act like it’s high school, or something like that.

Me? A catty bitch? (photo by Micah)

The problem here is this is not the first time I’ve heard this sort of argument. In fact, it seems to be the new way to fight all the criticism directed at Palin “Oh, you just don’t like her because women love to hate other women.”

Luscombe writes:

1. She’s too pretty. This is very bad news. At school, pretty girls tend to be liked only by other pretty girls. The rest of us, whose looks hover somewhere around underwhelming, resent them and whisper archly of their “unearned attention.” So, if everyone calls your candidate “hot,” you’re in a whole mess of trouble. If the Pakistani head-of-state more or less hits on her, well, yes, she’ll get a sympathy vote, but we’re in Dukakis-in-the-tank territory. It’s an admiration vaporizer. (Of course a candidate can’t be too ugly, or it will scare the men, who are clearly shallow as a gender.)

2. She’s too confident. This also bodes ill. Women have self-esteem issues. But they also have other-women’s-esteem issues. As almost any woman — from the head of the Budgerigar Breeders association to Queen Elizabeth — can attest, it’s almost impossible to get confidence right. Too timid and you’re a pushover. Too self-aggrandizing and you’re a bad word unless it’s about a dog, or Project Runway’s Kenley. Or Michelle, my best friend until 9th grade, after she won that debating prize and got cocky.

3. She could embarrass us. History is not on Palin’s side. Every time a woman gets a plum job, be she Hewlett-Packard’s ex-boss, Carly Fiorina, or CBS’s Katie Couric, there’s always that whispery fear that people will think she got the job just because she’s a woman. So if things don’t go well — and a couple of YouTube clips have suggested that they’re certainly not going well for Palin — women are the first to turn on her for making it harder for the rest of us to louse up at work.”

Not only do I call bullshit, but I also smell a rat.

McCain picks Palin to obviously court female voters, female voters say “who? really?”

Female voters educate themselves on Palin (yes, we do that…).

NONconservative female voters revolt.

McCain team scratches head. (and balls)

Palin starts to tank.

McCain spin machine realizes sell to “Moms” and “average women” isn’t going as planned, paints Palin as victim of “gotcha journalism, evil media, catty women.”

Let’s be clear here. I will admit women operate differently then men, however we certainly are not attacking Palin because she’s “pretty” or “confident.” In case this writer missed the memo, here are MY reasons for not voting for and fighting against Palin with everything I have in my arsenal:

#1 She’s against abortion in all circumstances including rape and incest.

#2 She would like creationism taught in public schools.

#3 She hoped the Iraq war was a task from God

#4 She denies that global warming is man-made.

#5 She served As Director Of ‘Ted Stevens Excellence In Public Service’ 527

#6 She believes it was ‘Gods Will’ to build a gas pipeline in Alaska

#7 She dismisses alternative energy

#8 She opposed expanding hate crime laws

#9 She supports denying benefits to same sex couples

#10 She supports abstinence only policies

Those are just 10 reasons I have some “weapons grade” hate for Palin, none of which have to do with her hair, her clothing, her confidence, or her ability to “embarrass” my gender (even though WOW she’s good at that one).

I didn’t even touch on her lack of ability to handle the media, her willingness to lie to the American public, her lack of knowledge on many subjects including the rest of the GLOBE, or the total blatant and obvious way she’s been chosen to try and sway ME to vote McCain.

No, no…you see…as it turns out, we’re not the mean girls, as Luscombe suggests. It turns out we’re just SMART girls.

*special thanks to Think Progress for their Palin Digest

**Pretty, confident, nonembarassing women WE LOVE:

Gov. Kathleen Sebelius, Late Gov. Ann Richards, Michelle Obama, Stephanie Herseth Sandlin, Shelly Berkeley, Debbie Wasserman Shultz, Claire McCaskill, Mary Landrieu, Hilda Solis, Indira Ghandi, Barbara Boxer, Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Mikulsky, Stephanie Tubbs Jones. Betty Sutton, Loretta Sanchez, Elizabeth Edwards, Golda Meir, Benazir Bhutto, Donna Brazile, Gabby Giffords, Marsha Blackburn, Cathy McMorris Rogers, Arianna Huffington, and even Hillary Clinton when she’s not using the GOP playbook to win primaries. I will also throw in Condi Rice, because she is smart and qualified, even if we don’t agree on issues.

Add your “pretty, confident” favorites to the comments. Because we all know women actually do support other women, and we’re not falling for this load of crap that Palin is now the victim of some gender conspiracy. She’s the victim of her own incompetence and being on the wrong side of issues we other women are actually knowledgable and passionate over.

Filed Under: #suckit, Feeling YaYa

One ER Trip Shows Me McCain HealthCare FAIL

October 3, 2008 by Queen of Spain 14 Comments

Exhibit A: Rock

Exhibit B: Foot

Exhibit C: Broken

I just spent $800, with health insurance, to take care of my VP debate party toe trauma. My injury was inflicted, on accident, by my 5-year old and gravity.

That $800 is the monthly cost for our family’s health insurance, which does not include the bill that will come from the hospital for my share of what insurance did not cover.

Senator John McCain’s ‘Victory Chairman’ Carly Fiorina guest posted on BlogHer not too long about her candidate’s big health care overhaul. She tells me under the McCain plan my family would get $5000 to purchase our own health care. For the whole year. $5000.

Ummmm. We spend $9800 per year, right now for just myself and my kids. That does not count co-pays, xray bills, procedures, drugs, labs, and anything else that pops up.

So we’re missing a family member under that figure AND that’s just monthly with no real costs that happen over the course of a month.

I fail to see where the overhaul here.

Help me out.

Note that I did not even get into the 5 hours I spent in my neighborhood emergency room. 5 hours.

I encourage you to read the comments over on Ms. Fiorina’s BlogHer post and tell me what you think of McCain’s plan. I have to go ice my toe and take another pain pill that cost me more than I really care to go look at right now.