Lobe Holes

I have to call my crazy ass cousin today. I really don’t want too. But I still haven’t called her to thank her for sending my kids’ a Christmas gift. Nevermind it came mid January…but I did say this was my crazy ass cousin.

One (of the many) reasons I dread calling her is because she’s going to ask when I’m getting Princess Peanut’s ears pierced. Or she’ll ask why on earth I haven’t done it yet.

Because I think its fucking stupid, that’s why.

I’m not sure if it’s a cultural thing. Or a regional thing. Or just a generation thing. But my family seems to think I’M THE CRAZY ONE for not have shot holes in my daughter’s ears before she can talk.

I’ll admit I think tiny little earrings on babies are cute. But not cute enough to risk infection, or tetanus, or the pain my daughter will endure (however briefly) for the sake of fashion. I’ll just stick to dressing her up on leopard print and pink.

I don’t give a shit if people think she’s a boy. All babies seems gender non-specific to me.

But most of all, I don’t care if every one of my cousins has done it to their daughters. I’m not trying to buck the system or anything. I’m not trying to make a statement. I just find it ridiculous.

And after last night’s Super Bowl Dove commercial that had me in tears, I am CERTAINLY not going to force some sort of beauty ritual on her, before she’s even old enough to know what the hell a beauty ritual is, anyway. She’s got years to feel shitty about some aspect of herself and I’m not going to set the pace in her infancy.

What are we doing to our daughters? Is ear piercing any better or worse than me sticking her in a dress and tights? I’m certainly NOT going to put her in the little, teenie, tiny mini-mini skirt (that I swear would have half her diapered ass hanging out) that same cousin sent. I’m also not going to deny her if she asks 5 years from now to get those ears pierced. But I think that’s the key here
…when she asks.

So I’m off to call my crazy ass cousin. I’m feeling the need to crank the PJ Harvey, or Sleater-Kinney, or maybe some Patti Smith…just ’cause.


  1. I was brought up on the rule that little girls dress and behave like little girls. I am doing the same for my girls. They can play dress up, but we have no pretend make up. They have babies, but they are character Barbies, so they aren’t little fashion models. I had to wait to be in 6th grade to get my ears pierced, and so will they. My father hated the idea of earrings, so it’s a miracle I got them when I did. Ironically, my ears don’t deal well with being pierced, and I currently have no holes in my ears.

  2. The Dove commerical was my favorite too!

  3. Maybe you should tell the cousin that you decided to pierce the boy’s ears instead.

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  6. Becky just made me spit coffee.

  7. I totally agree…when SHE asks.

    Sydney got her ears pierced when she was 3. She started asking and we were honest with her and told her it would sting for a couple minutes, so then she said no. But once she decided she didn’t care if it stung and started asking again, we took her. I think they look adorable on babies too, I however could never bring myself to have earrings shot through those little tiny earlobes.

    Oh, and about Peanut’s hair…It’s adorable the way it sticks up! That’s one thing for sure her and Ayden have in common, and Sydney had it too. I think it’s cute as hell and anybody that tells you different in an ass.

  8. Oops, I meant IS an ass

  9. I am totally with you on this one. Unless it is part of your culture or your religion (fashion doesn’t count as part of a culture here), piercing a baby’s ears is just plain stupid to me.

    There’s the risk of infection, and there’s the risk of tearing the things out, or pulling them out and eating them. No thanks.

    I was allowed to get my ears pierced when I was 13. I had to be a teenager before I was allowed to do it. My mom wanted to make sure I really understood what I was doing, and that I would be able to care for them on my own.

    Doing it before your child knows what’s going on is crazy. It’s essentially altering a child’s body without their permission. When that kid is older, she may really resent what her parents did to her.

    Yeah, I’m just a little passionate about the topic. I’ve seen kids with severely infected ears, and I’ve seen kids with torn earlobes from having an earring torn out while playing.

    Fashion is a dumb reason to take risks like that. If I dress her in a dress, at least it won’t have lasting effects, other than embarrassing her with photos when she’s older.

  10. My husband is against it too and I’ve come around. I still think it’s cute but I couldn’t do that to my daughter. I had to wait until my mom got her ears done and that was when I was 15. Top that off with all three times, my ears got infected. (It was done at the mall all 3x). When I pierced the next 7 holes myself, no infections. I really liked having my ears pierced in my early 20’s. Too afraid to get anything else pierced til later. If she’s at an appropriate age, my Peanut can have them done when she asks. Maybe. Ha!

  11. I had a server in an Applebees harass me about why I hadn’t peirced Claudia’s ears when she was six months old.

    I personally think it’s nuts – but mostly because I see it as a choking hazard. I know I ate jewelry when I was a toddler.

    I have the same take on this as you. When she asks, she can do it. Same for the boy. Piercings grow back if you change your mind later.

  12. I’m totally with you on that issue, even though I have boys 🙂

    I think I wrote a post a long time ago about the subject after witnessing a shrieking toddler being pinned down to have it done..

    That commercial was cool, but my favorite was the FedEx one with the dinosaurs! LMAO!

  13. i’m waiting for Zoe to make that call too….
    On the ads thing, I haven’t seen it (being in aussie land and not even knowing what a superbowl is!) but it’s always amazed me that the quality of ads change when something HUGE is on. When the olympics were in Sydney, the ads were awesome…

  14. Tell her your daughter will decide IF and WHEN to get her own damn ears pierced. As if, you have the time to wash and disinfect her ears EVERY SINGLE day on top of all the other crap you do.



  15. I’m against both – ear piercing and miniskirts. I haven’t even put A bow on her head (granted she has no hair). UGH. I can barely stop playing with my earrings (which I wear maybe once a year and then I take them out cuz they are such an asspain). How does a small child not obsess over them?

  16. SO how’d the call go? LOL?

  17. Yes, how DID the call go?

    We pierced the girls’ ears when they asked for it, and were able to understand the consequences. That meant my twins didn’t get theirs done at the same time, Sage just didn’t want to when Maya did, and they were both OK with it. I thought that was cool (plus people could tell them apart more easily for a while!)

  18. I didn’t call. After posting I just wasn’t in the mood to deal with her. Maybe tomorrow…

  19. errr, I am getting Pumpkin’s ears pierced in a few weeks… I do understand your side though, and really see this as a personal choice thing. Why should your cousin care if you do not? Good luck when you make the phone call.

  20. You go, Peanut’s Mommy! I think you should tell your cousin you’ve decided to get her a nice tattoo instead.

    My six year old asked when she could get pierced ears. I told her when she was 16. Maybe I will relent and go for 13 if she REALLY wants to get them pierced. Right now she doesn’t seem to care much, though.

    Keep up the good work for your kiddos.

  21. I totally agree with you about the ear piercing thing

  22. People thought I was nuts too for not doing it when my daughter was a baby… the idiots claim it hurts less! BS! If anything I would claim it hurts more when you are so teeny and sensitive and when you have no clue what the fuck just happened!

    So, with our daughter we waited. She turned 5 in November and since I have quite a few piercings, she was pretty into getting one… “but one in each ear Mami… is it ok if I don’t get many like you?” It was sweet! I told her to get it if she wanted to and I did not expect her to get more than one in each ear.

    So, before Christmas she got her ears pierced and it went great. I had always wanted to wait for her to be old enought to understand that there would be some pain involved and for her to own that pain… and she did it so beautifully! And because of my piercings I know that the ears remain ultra sensitive for quite some time and that must be hell for a baby! So no… she owned her piercing pain and we made it through maintenance and she only recently made it to the point where it doesn’t hurt her at all when I clean her ears and move the earrings around in the hole… and she is so proud of herself!

  23. Setting her up in this world to make her own decisions about what she does with her body~~~~

    best thing you can do for her IMHO.

    There’s more than one way to live a life.

  24. I have 20 holes in my ears, pierced ones that is. I got the first set as a small child but the rest are the result of adolescent rebellion and boredom, mostly self performed.
    My point being, I wouldn’t pierce a baby either.

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