I Want My Bra Back, Bitch

I’ve single handedly killed the women’s movement.


Mind you, it’s the women’s movement from the 60’s. The one that seems to assume anyone who doesn’t like a woman does not like her based on her vagina.

NEWSFLASH: People do not like Hillary Clinton for a variety of reasons-99.9% of them have nothing to do with her vagina.

It’s not some grand scheme by the patriarchy to make us think it’s not about her vagina. It is really, and truly, not about her vagina. And the current crop of females are really and truly not that easily fooled.

When you talk to the anti-Hillary crowd they say a number of things from “I hate her husband” or “I hate that she stayed with her cheating husband” or “I hate the way she voted on Iraq” or even “I hate the Clinton name” or “I hate the idea of Universal Health Care” OR they even say “I just really don’t like her at all.”

It is the last one that the old school feminist crowd is SURE means: “because she’s a tough broad and we hate tough broads.” Or they like to tell us it’s because we’ve been conditioned to think a strong woman is a bitch and should be hated.

I feel the need to list strong women that are generally loved by society right now, but I will resist the urge.

There are also women who are actually HATED because they are women.

Senator Clinton does not fall into either of those categories. She does not garner that “we hate hillary” happy fun time chant based on her gender. It would be so much easier if she did. Then we could all jump up and scream SEXIST! You men try and keep us down and you can suck it! …Or something.

Personally I am ok with Senator Clinton as a politician, she plays the game, she schemes, she gets shit done, she makes behind-closed-door-deals, she even launches negative ad campaigns and speaks in half-truths.

Senator Barack Obama plays this game as well. He does it as well or better than she does and THAT is why I’m voting for him. Despite his race (sarcasm) he seems to avoid the hate Senator Clinton does. Now, go ahead and fight over the race/gender issue but I really believe it’s all about personality.

The African-American candidate does not seem to be having issues winning over voters. The female candidate does.

A + B = sexism for the old school.

A + B =less than dynamic candidate for the new school.

If Senator Clinton could be a better public speaker maybe this wouldn’t be a problem. If Senator Clinton was named Senator Hillary Smith maybe this wouldn’t be a problem. But the default position that it’s all about her vagina is weak.

You see, we new school feminists don’t look too much at that gender thing unless forced. We’re over it because what is left of the patriarchy we tend to crush here and there when we feel like it or are bored with mommyblogging.

I refuse to vote for Senator Hillary Clinton simply because she has a vagina. And I refuse to be guilted into voting for her when there is an equally qualified and viable candidate, from my party, on the ticket.

I am not going to sit around and let people accuse ME of being a bad feminist. The problem is the majority of women under the delusion that my letter to Senator Clinton was for her to bow out due to pressures from the patriarchy are feminists still fighting the old fight. The one where women were not in the board room. The one where you were conditioned to stay-at-home with your offspring and have no life of your own.

I have choices. While I thank those same women for fighting to give me these choices, I loathe them for finding me ill educated enough to make a choice on my own and without their advice.

Is there still sexism? You bet. Are there still battles to be fought? Of course.

But speaking as the woman with two books by Senator Clinton on my nightstand, a signed letter by then First-Lady Clinton framed, and who genuinely thinks she has the ability to be President…this is not about gender. This is about the right person for the job.

Clinton divides. Obama unites.

The end.

I encourage all women to leave a link to their post on the subject. I know Mrs. Flinger already has her post rocking the Mom-o-sphere. Tell me, do you vote with your vagina? Do you make every decision in your life based on the patriarchy?

Also…I love bras-they keep the girls lifted. Burn mine and I’ll cut you.

*It’s been brought to my attention with the new design you can’t see the links very well, but if you click on the BRAs you’ll understand the sarcasm, or not. There are some links in the first sentence too. I know, hard to see. Working on it. Rome wasn’t built in a day here people.


  1. This part right here, “I have choices. While I thank those same women for fighting to give me these choices, I loathe them for finding me ill educated enough to make a choice on my own and without their advice.”

    I couldn’t agree with more. Amen. Amen.

    And godbless your work here. We’re a new generation of women. I’m so glad to have that title.

  2. I am Canadian, so have no input on US politics.

    I came here via Mrs. Flinger, because I happened to post tonight on the differences between boys and girls.

    She sent me your way 🙂

  3. Once again, a rockin’ good post, where you have said everything I’m thinking on this subject and said it well.

    P.S. I started to wade into this debate on the Feminist Housewives Ning site and have since bailed.

  4. Personally, while I think my vagina is reasonably maneuverable in specific contexts, the voting booth is just not one of them.

    Okay srsly, I love that you’re blogging about this, you are one brave badassed bitch. You’re making me feel a little more brave too, to articulate that despite the enormous debt we all owe to the second-wavers who broke so much crucial ground for women and girls everywhere, and even when there is still so much ground to be broken (misogyny is, of course, far from dead), we have a right to consider all candidates on their actual merits and not just their respective genitalia and the traditional privileges accorded thereto.

    I mean, really, fuck that.

    I voted for Obama because I believe he’s the better candidate, for reasons of policy. There’s the “Unites” issue – sure – but for me it boils down to trust. I trust him more. Yes, plenty of what gets said about the Clintons is right-wing propaganda pre-digested and spat at us hourly until we no longer recognize its origin.

    But enough of it is just facts. NAFTA; welfare “reform;” Defense of Marriage Act; Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell; Extraordinary Rendition… etc.

    Besides which, we can’t afford to lose in November. We just plain fucking CAN’T.

    PS I dig the rad new template. You’re making me think about actually blogging again and not just Twittering… maybe.

  5. Well, while I still don’t think Obama unites (sorry, I just can’t… I’ve tried, but I can’t get behind him) I also don’t vote with my gonads.

    I research the candidates, their positions on the issues, whether or not I think they actually have workable solutions or are off in la-la-land when it comes to implementation, what their ability to lead is, and whether or not I think they will have a positive impact on the country.

    Look, for the first time in history, the 4 major contenders consist of a black man, a woman, a mormon, and a stereotypical aging white protestant veteran.

    When 3 out of 4 choices go so radically outside the bounds of the ‘norm’ I think it’s safe to say that most people aren’t voting their gender, race, or religion – they’re voting for whomever they think will make the best president.

    Me? I’d still vote for Hillary over Obama, but not because of her chromosomes or her reproductory equipment.

    I don’t believe “the best man for the job is a woman” – I believe “the best person for the job is determined regardless of gender.”
    That’s what we call old school feminism.

  6. i try to do pretty much everything i can with my vagina. i haven’t quite figured out the ballot logistics yet, but i’ve got until november to practice squeezing those muscles in just the right way.

    sorry, are only serious comments welcome on this post?

  7. well, i thought your letter to senator clinton was my favorite post ever, but now this one is.

    when i was in school (a lit major) we revisted feminist theory over and over and OVER again. there was this question: can you wear a thong and still be a feminist? that really got people going.

    i didn’t understand it, at the time. i was all: of course you can wear a thong! you can wear and do and be whatever you want! isn’t that the point!

    i get it now that i’m older. but, for the record, i still think you can wear a thong and be a feminist. i prefer going commando myself, though. thongs are super uncomfortable.

  8. I’ve been offended by the media’s assumption that white women will flock to Hillary because she’s a woman. You mind as well suggest that I’ll buy that car because you painted it pink.

    The idea that we should vote for a candidate because she’s a woman goes against everything feminism has taught me.

    I’m choosing a candidate based on MY understanding of the issues and the ability of that candidate to be a good leader–not because my husband or daddy told me who to vote for.

    That is feminism succeeding!!

  9. I had a very interesting conversation with a friend of mine last night about all this. She said something that I think summed it up pretty well. “Voting for Hillary because she is a woman is just as bad as not voting for her because she is a woman.” We are looking for equality right? Then don’t vote Because Hillary is a woman, because Barack is black, or even because McCain is white. It is a disservice to everything the world has gone through to make these decisions based solely on gender or race.

  10. I think you’re brilliant. I think this is such an interesting point in time that we are at. Such a good time to examine feminism and how to inspired a new generation to get involved. I don’t think the NY NOW chapter inspires when it berates us for betraying Hillary. How could an organization that aims to empower us so quickly devalue our choice with one sentence?
    My vote for Obama was actually inspired by Gloria Steinem’s Op ed piece in the NY times. She told me to vote for Hillary because she was the best person for the job and because she’s a woman. I had the second part down but then this other guy came and gave me some lovey dovey hope….. He hooked me with his “gay and straight” talk and for a moment I thought, “wow, we might all get represented here….”
    I love Hillary. I love that we’re all talking about this and blogging about this and taking an interest in this. I love that she plays the game but I love even more that Obama seems to be taking visible steps to change the game. A bit. But let’s be realistic, they are ALL politicians. And that’s OK. They are both better than what we’ve got now…..

  11. I love the new design. And I love the stand you are taking.

    The F-word always gets women riled up because I think we all have our own definition and if we don’t fit someone else’s definition shit hits the fan.

    If my priorities were in line with Hillary’s, you damn right I’d vote for her. But there not and I can’t cram them into that mold and hope for the best. It doesn’t work this way.

    I have my own decision to make and it’s not an easy one. I refused to feel guilty about not voting for a woman because I’m a woman.

  12. Love this post. Couldn’t agree more about the old-school feminists. It’s like they haven’t woken up to the fact that maybe they actually accomplished something with their hard-fought battles of the 60s and 70s.

    My vote for Obama had nothing to do with genitalia, but everything to do with wanting a kinder, gentler country (yes, it absolutely comes down to personality). This isn’t a cool, angry -at-the-femi-nazis post, but I posted about a tough decision I made earlier in my life that parallels in many ways the decision we Dems are facing with the Obama/Clinton choice.


  13. For the record, I am a white male republican and I would vote for Hilary or Obama before I would have voted for Romney.

    Great post, Queen!

  14. This has been the hardest and most interesting primary season ever, and one of the things I have most resented about it is the idea that I would vote with my vagina. Not the idea, the assumption, actually. The presumption.

    I first wrote about Obama a year ago here and my own letter to hillary clinton just last month.

    I’ve been inspired back to participation after years of lying dormant and cynical. That’s huge, because when the second Bush term happened, I more or less gave up on believing any candidate could really make any change. Hope is a good thing. 🙂

  15. This whole shit about the Florida and Michigan delegates is really pissing me off. HIllary might really be losing it now. Ugh.

  16. My sister was one who voted Hilary based on her gender, and her desire to see a woman in office. I shake my head, and hope that 10 years from now she sees why that was the wrong reason to cast that vote.

    I watched Hilary. I considered Hilary. When she wouldn’t stop walking all over Obama while he was speaking, while he had to hold his “shut up a minute” finger up at her so that she would stop and he could speak, I lost all respect for her. At another convention, I watched her berate and alienate herself from every conservative in the Country. Her comments were backhanded, hateful, and not-necessary. She’s rallying people together based on their hatred, and that is not a personality trait I’m looking for in a President.

    It’s definitely not about being a woman, it’s about being a Candidate that can move our Country forward, and bring people together to form bonds over their commonalities and work through disagreements diplomatically.

    Honestly? Part of me wishes she DID have those traits, because it would certainly be nice to have a woman in office. I think it would take women to a higher level of respect, where we could say “see? We CAN be anything we want”. But alas, she’s just proving that we can be bitches, and we cry and pout if we don’t get what we want. That’s terribly sad.

  17. Margaret Thatcher was one tough lady, and I would have never voted for her and that wouldn’t have had a single damn thing to do with her gender. Same here. I don’t trust her, and having a penis wouldn’t help with that.

  18. Didn’t we go through what we did in the seventies (yes, I’m an old-school feminist) so that women would not be defined by their gender? Vote for the candidate with the best qualifications. Period. (oops, poor choice of words perhaps…)


  1. […] the queen of spain, with her request that hillary clinton drop out of the race and her subsequent response to the intense feminist backlashing that flooded her blog (and at least 1/4 of the whole internet) in […]

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