There’s a Bounty on My Head in Washington DC

How much do these people hate me to continue this shut down?

That’s what I keep thinking as Democrats and Republicans continue to squabble over what was supposed to be the budget, but really came down to how much they hate me.

Yes. Me.

I benefit from Obamacare already. As someone who is chronically ill with one of those nasty pre existing conditions, I need those lifetime caps lifted and I need to know I can get insurance if something were to happen to the insurance we have now.

But others out there seem to think that not only do I NOT need these things, they are so sure of it and so angry about it and so worked up over all of us getting insurance they’ve waged war and shut down the government in protest.

They are calling it a government slimdown. You know, showing us all the things we can truly live without if we’d only work a little harder and try.

My da

And all I can think is man…they really hate me. They really, truly, hate me. They hate people like me who are signing up for coverage as I type this. Buying insurance for their families or their small businesses so they no longer have to worry about cutting their pills in half to make them last longer. So they no longer have to go to the ER for that cough that they never treated because they didn’t have a regular doctor and that cough turned into a fever and that fever into pneumonia.

They hate us because we want insurance. Affordable insurance that we purchase ourselves. Sure, some of us might get some help from the government in buying that insurance if we need it, and some of us might not, but at least we can’t be turned away because we have Lupus or cancer or because one of our kids has asthma or allergies.

They hate us so much they even call us names. Just this week I was called a Welfare Queen, a bitch who sucks the government tit, and I was called the reason our great nation is drowning in debt.

Never mind I currently don’t take any government assistance. I do have a hearing next week with Social Security disability. They’ve denied me and my private insurance disability has provided attorneys to fight with an appeal. Why? My guess is the private insurance doesn’t want to pay my disability, they would much rather Social Security foot the bill. It’s part of my contract with the private insurance that they take on this fight for me so I don’t have much choice in the matter. But I digress.

I’m hated because I was a functioning, contributing member of society who got sick. Very sick. I did what any normal American would do…went to doctors, got many tests performed on me, and paid all the bills that came our way from every doctor and every lab and every hospital. Yes, we have insurance. Good insurance. But you see, the bills…they keep coming.

Soon the savings was gone. Then we had to start using credit cards to pay the bills. Then we had to talk to family for help. Then we talked to the bank. Then we talked the government and the bank about the HAMP mortgage re-fi program for people like us who had never been late on a payment but were worried we might be because of all the medical bills that still have not stopped.

We did what those men in suits reciting Dr. Seuss expected us to do, we took responsibility for ourselves. We continued to pay our bills. We STILL pay our bills, but again, they keep coming. That’s the tricky part about getting sick nowadays. You can prepare and prepare and prepare just like you are supposed to, but one major illness and financial ruin is no longer something that happens to someone else. The bills don’t ever stop, and your income goes DOWN not up.

But they don’t care if I’m sick and undergoing treatment. They don’t care if we continue to pay our bills while taking advantage of the provisions in Obamacare and shopping the exchanges to see if we can’t find a way to lower our costs. No…they hate me, and everyone like me.

Have cancer? They hate you. Manage to get in a car wreck? Oh they hate you too. To them you are nothing but a freeloader. A moocher. Someone who, apparently, should have had the MILLIONS they have stashed away for when they get in that fender bender that throws out their back and makes it impossible for them to work.

So I sit and wonder why they hate us so much. I realize we argue over the big issues like abortion and same-sex marriage. But is that enough to leave me without coverage? Without protection? Without doctors and medicine?

In essence: are our political differences enough that you would leave others to die?

I think the past two weeks have given us the answer.

Yes. Yes they would leave you to die. Survival of the fittest is their motto and we don’t fit the bill.

Of course, many in their own families don’t fit the bill but they will tell you they planned better.

Of course, many in their own families suffer with illnesses like we do but they will tell you they changed their lives and made sacrifices and worked harder than we did. Which means they deserve to live, and we do not.

No, I’m not sure why they can’t see that not everyone can plan as they can. Not everyone has millions and not everyone can dig their way out of medical debit and not everyone has family to fall back on and not everyone has anyone for support.

But that’s not their problem. In fact, they’d like you to simply go away. Head to ‘your closest church’ is what I was told, and there I would find ‘whatever I needed.’ Today I was at my closest church for my daughter’s basketball game. Out of curiosity I asked what was available for a family in a situation like ours.

I was told they had a lost and found we could go through and winter coats should be coming in soon.

That’s not exactly the blood plasma and chemo I use to keep me going.

Perhaps they don’t realize that most of the chronically ill can’t drive. They rely on things like Meals on Wheels and WIC, but those that hate us were too busy shutting down those programs while making sure WWII Vets could look at a memorial. Never mind that Mom can’t get out of bed because her pills have run out and she would take her youngest to preschool but the local Head Start program is also shut down, because those types of kids don’t really need an education anyway, right?

That’s how much they hate us.

Which brings me back to wondering why. What is it that makes them hate us so much they would push our government to the brink of default, push 800-thousand of us out of work and call it ‘fat trimming,’ ignore every economist on earth screaming what will happen globally if the US defaults, but more importantly what will happens to their OWN PEOPLE. Social Security checks. Small business loans. Veteran benefits. Clinical trials of drugs that may SAVE LIVES.

Why do they hate me so much? Why do they hate you so much? Why do they want us to die? Why don’t they care?

Is it money? They say money is the root of all evil…so is it money? Is there a sinister plan that nets them millions once this is all over?

Are we worth millions in cash to them? Millions of suffering or even dead Americans = millions in cash.

I know I don’t agree politically with those on the right. I know I can argue like hell to get my point across. But never, EVER, would I wish them ill. Would I wish them the hell I am going through. Would I wish them dead. And never would I VOTE to show them just how much I want them out of my life. I would never vote to demand their services, that in some cases sustain their lives, be terminated.

I don’t know why they want me dead, but there seems to be a bounty on my head in DC and I thank the President and the Democrats for fighting for my right to live.


  1. What I hate is the intellectual dishonesty in insisting people just wouldn’t get sick “if…” If they took better care, if they ate better food, if they worked out, if they worked harder.

    My sister got MS and, 15 years later, died from it – after a great deal of expensive medical treatment and medical equipment. There’s no way she could have anticipated, predicted, or prevented it, much the same with your lupus.

    People get sick. And when they get sick, they need medical care. Everyone is going to need it at some point or another – that’s why insurance or some type of health coverage shouldn’t be optional, not in this great country of ours.

  2. They don’t seem to understand that Sue. They live in a world where they just ‘ask’ their parents for money for college and Ann Romney’s auto immune disorder gets the best treatment in the world, including time with her horses. I have a feeling their insurance doesn’t cover that type of therapy.

    And it’s sad that those tea party, every day people are backing these members of Congress but not their own interests. Their demographic matches up with the demo receiving the MOST federal help. Will they be shocked when their checks stop coming and they realize it’s their fault or will they continue to blame the President?

    But more importantly WHY DO THEY HATE US SO MUCH that they would allow us to die? They fight to move cones and barriers to a memorial but they won’t fight to give FOOD to babies? Life and death situations vs photo ops.

  3. “There but for the grace of God go I.” I cannot understand why the people who want to take your lifeline away don’t seem to understand how life can turn on a dime.

  4. Thank you once again, Erin, for eloquently putting into words what I struggle to when trying to explain to family on the other end of the political spectrum why the ACA is so important (and in particular to me with MS)

    The offer for coffee or a drink is still open to you if you ever find yourself in NNJ or NYC. It would be an honor.

  5. At the risk of assuming, I think a large part of it is a presumption that providing assistance in any systemic way results in all costs going up. The argument would be that it is the existence of Medicaid in the first place that has driven up healthcare costs. Of course, that argument falls apart quickly unless the arguer is in favor of banning emergency care to uninsured without means.

    There are also those, including politicians I presume, who have simply bought into misinformation.

  6. Tess Stewart says:

    “So I sit and wonder why they hate us so much.” Under Ocare the rest of us have to go bankrupt to take care of you. All I see are junk plans on the exchange for more premiums. I put my premiums, deductibles, co pays using 2012 medical care and my out of pocket cost goes up by $15K. My decent plan gets cancelled just to pay for you and others who won’t just go into Medicaid. If you don’t have money and get sick our taxes cover you thru Medicaid. Now our medical care is trashed, our premiums go up our out of pockets go up but taxes don’t go down. Middle class is raped so you can have what you want and we get screwed. The law was passed on lies and deceit all to defraud the middle class. The $15K means I have to for go retirement savings which were decimated during the recession what BO has done nothing to make the economy better. After the 80’s recession the economy was growing at 7-8%, under the Liar in Chief .09%–you voted for him so you can get free stuff and the rest of up pay. Gee why wouldn’t we not just love you–it’ just such a great deal for us and our families. Our hard work, our time away from our families all so you can leech off of us.

  7. Tess,

    There are no more ‘junk’ plans because ACA got rid of them. Your premiums, just like MINE, have gone up every single year for many, many years. What you didn’t notice the year before last or the year before that or the year before that? In actuality premium hikes are finally slowing down, and are now at the slowest rate in many years.

    As for Medicaid. You can’t just ‘go’ on Medicaid. That’s not how it works. You have to qualify. It is NOT an easy process. I’m in month 29 of my process if that gives you ANY indication.

    As for what you qualify for- is your state participating and cooperating? Did it take the federal money for Medicaid expansion? All of those costs you are seeing is a direct result of your state’s participation or lack there of in ACA.

    We went into savings as well. We’ve also PAID INTO THE SYSTEM just as you have. Yet when one of us gets sick, you call us a leech.


Speak Your Mind