We’re not going to be rubbing Vicks in inappropriate places

I think there is an old wives tale that has infiltrated our minds and I’d like to, here on my blog, clear it up for good. I feel it’s my duty to inform the public.

Getting married and having kids does not mean your wife will suddenly STOP being interested in sex.

I’m not saying she has time for sex. But she will WANT sex.

There is a bit of a, ahem, dry spell going on here in the royal kingdom. Days upon days of very ill children, inlaws, and now, a rather ill wife.

And I’m feeling rather, um…frisky.

Just yesterday the Kaiser and I did the Friends routine where Monica is sick, but in denial, and trying to get Chandler to do it with her. She is in a robe, sneezing, totally stuffed up and says “You don’t want to get with this?”

The Kaiser did not want to get with this.

How I can feel so amorous and blow snot the size of my head out of my nostril is beyond me. But I’m also very sick and hungry, so much for that sick with no appetite thing.

I’m guessing my constantly tearing eyes don’t have that “come hither” look. And those raw, red patches under my nose may look a little, let’s just say, unappealing.

Personally I find my gray long-johns and Target-issued long sleeve shirt H-O-T.

They tell me Spring is here. Bleh, phooey, and HA! I say.

But soon, yes soon, the clouds will part and the sun will shine, spring will…um, spring, and the Kaiser and I will go at it like rabbits.


I asked my pediatrician when all of this winter/kid/snot/illness will end.

He said, “June.”

Anyway, my Tylenol Cold & Flu haze has gotten me away from my original point:

Women want it too. And it’s not that we don’t care to do it…we just don’t have an opportunity to do it. Sorry about that.



  1. Oh how I love me some FRIENDS. Why don’t they make shows like that anymore? LOL?

    I was eating a cupcake and laughed at the vicks scene and the cupcake flew across the room. My son said, “Mom, stop playing with your food. ” LOL.. thanks for the laugh.

    Feel better.

  2. Belinda is right. My glock-bustin’-out-moments are few and far between, but a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. And let me tell you what THIS girl’s done did:

    Demanded sex last night like a wound up teenager. Cuz this whole “I don’t feel good” and “I think it’s a cold” crap has gone on long enough.

    I’m with you on that. I ain’t playin’ around no mo’. Mr. Mocha’s gonna put out or ELSE. I’m in my 30s, damnit. I know how the truck handles and I’d like to go for a drive.

    Thanks. My sweet innocent moment is over now.

  3. Ha, I had actually just emailed some friends about this same topic! Granted there are nights when I just don’t want to. Don’t touch me, breathe on me, or look at me. But hello! A woman has needs too, fellas!

  4. “Getting married and having kids does not mean your wife will suddenly STOP being interested in sex.”

    Damn. And I’m just now getting this memo?

  5. Ugh, sorry you’re feeling sick also. I’ll join you and your snot with my bucket and chicken noodle soup.

    You know, I have to keep telling people that women still want sex after they’re married. Many don’t believe me, but then again, they’re unmarried men.

  6. “Getting married and having kids does not mean your wife will suddenly STOP being interested in sex. I’m not saying she has time for sex. But she will WANT sex.”

    May I say, from the male perspective: whoo-hoo!!!!

    I’m sorry…it had to be said.

  7. In the middle of our winter time illness fest, my husband didn’t mind gettin’ his groove on at the tail end of his illnesses. So, two random weekends, we were able to meet up in the night.

    The first time, I came down with the flu two days later. The second time, I got the runs two days later.

    So, I was getting a little bit gun shy. We also hit the dry spell. Today, we just couldn’t take it anymore. Had foster son at preschool, youngest daughter at Parent’s Day Out, and threatened the oldest two to watch a movie and not move until Mommy & Daddy came out of the bedroom!

    Afternoon Delight!

    I’ll let you know what I come down with on Saturday…

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