Barbie is One Sly Minx

I caved and bought that freaking Barbie and her 12 Dancing Sister Princesses Fairyworld Mermadia Utopia of Tutu’s and Fluff DVD.

Something in my GUT told me to say “no” but in case you don’t know there are three big storms coming our way and I need new movies dammit. I can only color and play cars for SOOOOO long people, come on.

As expected Princess Peanut donned her tutu and clapped and danced and was simply OVERJOYED at “Hi, I’m Barbie, I play Genevieve the oldest sister….” or some crap. Then it was a blur of songs and ballet shoes and gold dust and really bad CG (um, yes, I do know what bad animation looks like..hello…).

There was the much anticipated dancing and some inane plot about an evil step mother and a dying father and blah blah blah you know the story.

Mostly our first Barbie experience was harmless. I say mostly because I was slightly annoyed at the giggling over some cobbler boy (he makes the shoes, get with the program) and the rate at which my little Princess wanted to change outfits to twirl around in. But what really got me…was an unexpected interested in the movie by Count Waffles.

Mind you, he’s not even 5 yet and he’s very into “that’s a BOY toy not a GIRL toy” and “I don’t want PINK that’s a GIRL color”-yes, his feminist mother is so proud.

So when the Count wandered over to see what all the frufru was about and our little Peanut explained “Dat Barbie and DAT da Princesses and day daaaaaaaaaaaaaaace” the response was one I had NOT counted on:

“Wow. She really is beautiful.” And a glazed look fell over him and he sat down to stare.

Fuckin’ Barbie.






I’ll take you down bitch. Stay away from my baby boy.

And with that I shall now commence hating of his future girlfriends.


  1. ROFL! I’m glad I couldn’t sleep or else I may have missed this! hahaha Thanks!! IMHO – that Barbie in the video isn’t all that.

  2. Oh no! That sucks that he’s falling for Barbie. I hope he gets over his idolization of her beauty, since we all know she’s not exactly a realistic depiction of a woman.

    No woman will ever be good enough, though, will she?

  3. Very cute. Love the pics.

  4. Heh, too funny. You’ve got lots of fun in your future, that’s for sure.

  5. I can completely relate.
    In fact, because I’m a total slacker, I think I’ll post an old entry from my now defunked blog about how this very thing happened in my life.
    Damn Hussy Girls!

  6. I am so laughing my ass off! Yeah, Barbie showed her ugly slutty head in our home whilst in Spain, courtesy of my fucking clueless-will-not-listen-to-my-protests mother and is a once-in-a-while “treat” for the kids… I had to brainwash Lil’ BoheMia to love Hello Kitty and now she has a Hello Kitty room and I will gladly fork over the dough for all things Hello Kitty as she made a deal that as long as she understands I won’t buy Barbie and Bratz and such crap I WILL buy her all the Hello Kitty she wants… needless to say she got a little overzealous and MAN am I broke but anything to keep that Barbie outta my home!!!!

    As for the boys? Oy.

    My son had his first official flirting moment whilst on a playdate at my girlfriends home the other day. We know each other since we were both moms of one and now she has three cute little blond girls and her smallest was leaning over the coffee table, back to the table, blue tutu on, gazing into my boy’s eyes who was gazing back and took it upon himself to start stroking her chest while he said “Wow! Your dress is SO beautiful!” and she ran off, giggling. He ran after her yelling “I want to buy you a pink dress!” and all along my friend and I sat there, open mouthed and cracking up and probably doing our damndest to not think of “down the line” scenarios because my babies are NOT going to grow up and there will be NO sexuality going on and NO girl will so much as get close to my son and tempt him and turn him into a thinks-only-with-his-dick horndog and…

    What are you doing to me with this subject???? AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!


  7. Wow. You sound amazingly like my motherinlaw. LOL.

    As for Barbie, I’ve come to decide that Barbie is harmless and a much better choice than those damn Bratz–which I have banned from our home in perpetuity.

  8. Barbie is better then Bratz..however, you’ll never approve of the women in your son’s life. It doesn’t get easier even when your 61..

    So get ready…

    My best,
    Dorothy from gammology
    remember to call gram

  9. Oh geez, somebody pass the bucket! LOL – I watched as much as I could and realized in the three seconds there was a kitten on the screen that that’s ALL Sweet Pea would have seen – or at least cared about – in the whole movie. And what’s with the gold guys? Are they androids? Are the princesses dancing with Oscar and his twelve brothers?

    Those pictures are so damned cute, I wanna grab Princess Peanut and Count Waffles and smooch them and hug them!

  10. Uh, I’m not saying that I think Oscar is an android, mind you.

    And I’m thinking, how about Count Waffles gets all his dating out of the way, you can do your hating of the girlfriends all through that, and then you can love love LOVE Sweet Pea as your daughter-in-law?


    In my family none of the in-laws are good enough for my parents’ children, but *my* in-laws think I’m fabulous and talk about our house as “Violet’s house,” and nearly always consult me first about things. Of course, if they consult Slipshod first, the message never gets to me, so that’s probably got something to do with that part… but I’m just saying – hopefully he’ll find just the right girl and you’ll love her. :o)

  11. Oooooh don’t get me started on those Barbie things…we have the whole farking set.

    Adam hasn’t really shared his opinions about it all cept that he WILL watch it all with his sister.

    He did walk up to me today and whispered that I was friking hot.

    I don’t know…

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