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I’m Running Out of Energy

December 14, 2007 by 22 Comments

So yeah, I’m a little annoyed. That’s me using grown-up words because I’m on my best behavior here. But this one is personal (when aren’t they, you say…)
Many of you know I’ve been working on yet another mystery project for BlogHer. Well, cats out of the bag, as it were…and I’ve been busting my rather round buns on Election ’08.

BlogHer Co-Founder Lisa Stone has a very calm (something I don’t do well) and rational (something I do from time to time) post asking our community what they want/would like to see over at BlogHer for Election ’08. The part in her post that reads:

“Oct 2007:
-BlogHer invites Candidates Clinton, Edwards, Obama, (Democrats) and Giuliani, McCain, Romney and Thompson (Republicans) to answer Voter Manifesto questions on-camera, including an offer to fly to the U.S. location of the candidate’s choice and be interviewed for 15 minutes by a member of her or his own political party, by either Editor Morra Aarons or Editor Mary Katharine Ham (also of Townhall.com). No candidate accepts.
-BlogHer co-sponsors 10questions.com, a techpresident.com initiative co-sponsored by The New York Times and MSNBC.

Nov 2007:
–BlogHer re-invites candidates to answer Voter Manifesto questions on-camera. No candidate accepts.
-BlogHer members submit questions to 10questions.

Dec 2007: BlogHer re-invites candidates.-Candidates John Edwards and Mike Huckabee submit answers to 10questions.com. Candidate Ron Paul also agrees to participate, according to the site.
– Sen. Obama tours Iowa with Oprah Winfrey and his campaign launches “Women for Obama”:

The parts I highlighted up there? “BlogHer invites, BlogHer re-invites, BlogHer re-invites…” yeah, that’s me. And by “re-invite” it was, Erin busting out her long-ago-used news reporter skills to annoy campaigns. Of course I did a bit more than that too (my technical term here is PRODUCER and Field Reporter) the gist of it is me being told over and over and over and over again how important women are in this election yet being denied over and over and over again by every single presidential candidate running’s email, phone, or email and phone aide type person.

Annoyed. Yes. Yes I am.

We were handing them 7.6 million blogher readers on a golden blogher platter (while using our Butterball potholders, of course) the majority of them the WOMEN THEY WANT TO VOTE FOR THEM and interest by the candidates has been, shall we say…less than enthusiastic. We even offered them hosts from their own parties (Morra Aarons-Mele and Mary Katharine Ham, why YES you DO see them on CNN).

And I wonder why I still have to write about feeling ignored as a woman voter. By being patronized because Obama and Oprah have teamed up. By once again feeling like I was patted on the ass and sent to go cook in the kitchen. They can market to us, sure…but can they just TALK to us? We’re women, we want you to sit down and chat along WITH your stats and stances. We’re WOMEN, we want you to answer the tough questions about healthcare and education AND Iraq. We’re not afraid to talk about the economy and choice. Hell, one of you running is even ONE OF US, and is well aware we are no longer just reading the Style section and worried about whatever it is our husband’s tell us to worry about.

I also know one thing, deep down to my Queenly toes…these candidates will get possibly the fairest interview and most diplomatic handling that is currently on their agendas. Bar None. BlogHer has made sure of it, BlogHer is alllll about it, BlogHer tends to roll this way with EVERYTHING. So not only is this a great opportunity to reach their target demo, it’s one of the safest interviews they’ll ever have. Will we pitch softballs? No, but they’ve seen our Voter Manifesto, they know what we’re asking.

One thing keeps sticking with me throughout this whole, frustrating process-Oprah has 8 million viewers, BlogHer has 7.6 million readers.

We’re a nonpartisan dot com.

Yes, I’m annoyed. And quickly losing faith in this election process. I really want my faith back. I really want to believe.

I’m annoyed. And I’m waiting.

Go take the BlogHer survey. Make your voice heard.

Demand they pay attention. Our questions will NOT be ignored.

Filed Under: BlogHer, BlogHer.org, Feeling YaYa, Men and their duckcamps, Queenie Backup, Royal Rant

I TRIED to Tell You: Why OPRAH Matters

December 9, 2007 by 8 Comments

Back in October of last year I posted a piece here on HuffPo after I had watched a then, undeclared, Senator Obama sit with Oprah.

“Oprah is talking to Obama about the possibility of him running for President in 2008. And I’m ignoring the cries of ‘WHERE IS SPONGEBOB!’ to hear the answer.

A daytime talk show host is pushing politics on her show…and this mother is not only listening intently, but sitting on the edge of her seat to hear the banter.

Welcome to the new spin on campaigning, and the new breed of Mom voter. Get used to politicians and their wives on Oprah being watched by educated homemakers with tattoos and outspoken opinions. Get used to this making many people uncomfortable.”

Now we see Ms. Winfrey and the candidate stumping and it’s working.

Go ahead and shake your head that some talk show host is making a difference in the ’08 election. Go ahead and roll your eyes that these mothers and women care.

Fellow BlogHer Morra Aarons-Mele writes, “If you follow politics, you’ve no doubt heard that unmarried women represent a holy grail of voters: 50 million or so likely Democrats that year after year, flirt with voting and political activism, but don’t commit. This cycle, they’re dubbed the ‘Sex and the City voters.’ To woo these women, the establishment provides celebrities, and catchy spots laced with sexual innuendo–ooh, winking about their first time! Voting, that is.

My friend and Democratic pollster Margie Omero sent me the post about the Single Anxious Female frame. She noted to me, ‘Women, across marital status groups, vote at a higher rate than do men. But the coverage stemming from concern about ‘Single Anxious Women’ (even called the ‘Sex in the City Voter’) not only doesn’t reflect the data, it trivializes women.’ Even in 2007, women are pitched civics lessons as if we can only relate to global affairs if the issues are dressed in sexy shoes, just folks style dishing, or are at lunch with Samantha, Carrie and the girls.”

I suppose there is an argument to be make about gimmicks and celebrities being busted out for votes. I also think there is an argument to be made that Oprah is trusted and speaks to most women.

Marty Kaplan writes, “…Oprah may actually be the twenty-first century’s de facto national anchor. She really does channel — and change — Middle America.”

A national anchor that has the ear of just about every American woman I know.

Go ahead and laugh if you want, or be disgusted by “some celebrity” making a difference. Maybe you don’t care for her charity work or maybe you don’t like that she is wealthy and powerful. Maybe you don’t like that she does it with women top of mind. Whatever the reason, I suggest you take notice. As I mentioned in October,

“According to Women’s Voices. Women Vote. 20 million women did not vote in the last election. That’s 20 million women.

I’m guessing Oprah can reach a few of those 20 million women. I’m guessing Mommybloggers can reach a few of those 20 million women. I’m guessing the honesty and hopefulness of a young Senator can reach a few of those 20 million women.

I’m guessing YOU had better redefine that tiny box of yours to include 20 million different kinds of woman. We’re not clear cut. We’re not all Donna Reed. We’re not all what you think a woman should be. What a mother should be. What a sister should be. What a daughter, aunt, girlfriend, or Oprah watcher should be.

But we sure as hell can vote.”

I caution you to realize this does not only apply to Obama. As BlogHer’s Catherine Morgan points out, there are over 300 women discussing politics in blogs. Even my much-ridiculed Mommyblogger circle is educated and in on the act.

I’m tired of the snickering from those who find this less-than-serious politics. I’m tired of the feeling women voters are “cute” and entranced by Oprah or Hillary’s new hair-do.

I suggest the main stream media and other writers, political campaigns, and candidates themselves learn a lesson from the Oprah effect. As I’ve heard BlogHer Co-founder Lisa Stone say many times about many different things, “ignore us at your own peril.”

*cross posted at the Huffington Post, Erin Kotecki Vest also blogs at Queen of Spain blog and BlogHer.com

Filed Under: BlogHer, BlogHer.org, Feeling YaYa, Queenie Backup

Message To YouTube

December 2, 2007 by 11 Comments

On behalf of the League of Maternal Justice breastfeeding montage “banned” by YouTube, I give you my Message to the Asshats at YouTube. Apparently they prefer this over letters to the editor, so here goes…

and I’ll have you know I did this quick video despite this from the other day:

and THIS today: (look familiar?)

Yup, different kid, same couch. This one came with bonus hives!

Filed Under: Count Waffles, Feeling YaYa, Princess Peanut, Queenie Backup, Royal Decree, Royal Hooters

Outrage, again

November 27, 2007 by 10 Comments

Hi Folks –

Our humble breastfeeding montage (that received several honors and over 90K views) was deemed “inappropriate” by YouTube and was since banned from their site on November 20. We’re calling to action those with an interest in this heated topic. We need your support and voice to send a message loud and clear that this is not acceptable!

Please visit our site to see how you can participate and forward these links!

http://www.leagueofmaternaljustice.com/2007/11/its-only-just-b.html

For News Opportunities:

Press Release: http://leagueofmaternaljustice.com/pressrelease.html

Youtube Bans Protest Video
Video Depicted Breastfeeding Moms

A mom-produced internet protest video attacking Facebook’s banning of breastfeeding pictures was itself banned by the popular video sharing service Youtube after gaining recognition as the top-five most discussed of its day. A group of moms called Youtube’s action hypocritical and harmful, and pointed to dozens of sexually explicit and harmful videos currently allowed on the service. The moms also pointed to a number of state laws specifically stating that public breastfeeding was not inappropriate.

Thanks for your support,
Kristen Chase

Filed Under: Queenie Backup

Thankful I am NOT a Jets Fan this Thanksgiving

November 22, 2007 by 9 Comments

I really don’t think it’s too much to ask that if I take my daughter to a football game, we walk to get a pretzel and some nachos without being harassed by a drunken mob. Call me crazy, but I’d love to actually sit near Gate D at a New York Jets game and not be groped or screamed at or if, heaven forbid I’m feeling prudish that day, have to duck spit and flying bottles from hundreds of angry men.

Of course my daughter and I could just sit somewhere else. We could go get Mommy a beer and kiddo a hot dog near some other, non infamous gate, and avoid the whole thing- and then I remember this is 2007 and women do have the right to walk in public.

I suppose if I were to take my daughter and I on over that way, I would have been asking for it, right?

And people wonder why I still yell and scream and write about women and gender equality.

Many sports fans (my entire house included…yes, the girls too) are discussing the New York Times article by David Picker describing what happens at Jets home games on pedestrian ramps near Gate D.

Huffington Post contributor Leora Tanenbaum says, “I hate to sound like a broken record, but the sexual double standard is alive and well. Boys will be boys, and girls will be sluts. And across the land, people continue to believe that this is the way it’s supposed to be.” Tanenbaum drew attention and questioned the behavior while commentors asked for proof.

Let’s watch some YouTube, shall we???

As the NYT reports, this whole Gate D party is a tradition at Jets homegames. Meaning, Joe Jetsfan brings Joe Jr. Jetsfan, they share a beer, and join the mob out in the concourse to see how many women they can get to lift their shirts. Tradition. Happy Thanksgiving.

Some women comply. Some women walk away clothed and get heckled. Some women are spit on. Some women have bottles thrown at them. Some women are groped. More importantly…

hundreds of men think this is ok.

I attend sporting events. I am used to the one or two drunken idiots who scream four letter words and spill their beer. Security usually hovers near them and if they get out of hand they are escorted out. There is an entire mob getting out of hand at Jets games, and it’s tradition.


It’s Free Speech! We’re just having fun! Don’t come near Gate D if you don’t like it!

Let me speak in words you Gate D Jets fans understand, “Fuck you.”

Free speech is not harassment. Fun isn’t intimidating. And I’ll go anywhere I damn please, despite the fact I’m a woman. In fact, how about I come with a few thousand of your mothers, grandmothers, daughters, sisters, aunts, and girlfriends? We’ll exercise our free speech to teach you all about mob mentality, harassment, sexual abuse, intimidation, and gender equality issues.

I called Jets’ media relations to float my idea of taking Gate D back for the women. The nice PR phone-answering person took a message and I told them I was working on a deadline. “Yes, the HUFFINGTON POST, no, no…not Hubbington, HuFFington…and yes, BlogHER dot com. H-E-R, yes, BlogHER, yes, a network of over 13-thousand WOMEN…yes, I’d like to talk about the NY Times article, yes, the one about Gate D…yes, Blog H-E-R…”

…I’m still waiting for a call back. In the meantime, I’m going to really mess up Thanksgiving tradition and NOT spend it in the kitchen.

The Detroit Lions kick-off in an hour and my daughter and I have a game to watch.

Filed Under: BlogHer, BlogHer.org, Fantasy Football, Princess Peanut, Queenie Backup, Royal Family Outing

lovebugs

October 27, 2007 by 17 Comments

We’re settling ourselves in muggy Florida while the pollution from the fires lingers over and around our home. I talked with the Kaiser today and he sounds as if he smokes 10 cigars a night. Another friend says it looks like its going to rain, but there is no weather system in our region.

My son is allergic to pollution, as many of you know, and I am still just so relieved we are away. We’re keeping the asthma at bay despite a minor cold…something I know would not happen if we stayed in our valley. His little sister is also sniffling so today we just took a drive around my parent’s Florida town instead of anything touristy or too taxing on my recovering kids.

Stepping out of the minivan on a swampy island road, I discovered it’s lovebug season in Florida. Very quickly we were swatting and screaming and running back into the car. Then came the tears.

Nana had turned on the windshield wipers and many a lovebug was squished in the process.

Nana the bug murderer.

The 4-year old is SHOCKED, and my mom and I broke into giggles. Evil? Maybe…but I swear it was funny…mainly because I looked at my mom and said “what were you THINKING?”

I’m happy to be killing bugs here in Florida. I’d rather my son is crying over dead insects than crying with a mask over his face in a hospital bed. The stories of how the air is affecting our community are starting to pour in…none good and none I want to talk about right now.

Some asshats apparently tried to start another fire by us this week and my mind is just scrambled by these pyro fucktards who think any of this is a game. One of the largest fires here in SoCal is now officially being called arson, as are some others.

Frankly I’m all for public hangings. Or better yet…when we get back I’ll put them all on my van’s windshield and squish.

Breathing easy

Filed Under: Holding Court, Queenie Backup

Breathe Me

October 25, 2007 by 10 Comments

Looking down on Southern California from the safety of the sky, I could see nothing but an orange and brown wall of smoke. Moments earlier strangers were helping us through security as I simultaneously tried to give my asthmatic son his inhaler and take off both my kids’ shoes. Everyone was talking about the fires. The people in line, the ticket counter agent, even the woman who rang up my hastily bought crayons and plane toys. The same toys the kids were occupied with on take off while I sobbed in relief.

I hadn’t realized the stress and fear until we were away from danger. Maybe “danger” isn’t the right word. Our home was never in “danger” of burning down unless you count the first day of embers catching roofs two miles away. Sure we were surrounded within blocks by fires, but we never landed in an official evacuation zone. Our “danger” was a coughing son and rapidly deteriorating air quality.

News came as we boarded our plane that a child my son’s age in our town was in a coma from an asthma attack. As Count Waffles hacked and wheezed, I was feeling more and more justified in my decision to leave the state.

We could have driven north to friends for a few nights, but would have still returned to ash and soot in the air. We could have gotten a hotel, but they were at capacity just about everywhere and the cost of the room plus eating out would have equaled the last minute plane tickets.

I didn’t pack properly for the trip. Dirty clothes, winter clothes, long sleeves for Florida weather. Toys missing, socks missing. None of it mattered as we threw stuff in a suitcase to stay at hotel near the airport. We were afraid if we didn’t leave then, we might not get out on roads that could close at any moment the next morning. Plus the coughing. My son’s cough just getting worse and worse and worse. The news said the ER was overfilled. Keep the kids and seniors inside.What if he had an attack and we couldn’t get help?

All these factors had us packing. Our neighbors were staying put, but we were packing. I was torn on whether we were doing the right thing. Were we overreacting? Were we underreacting?

Then we landed in Orlando and my son’s cough disappeared entirely.

We’re staying 10 days and hoping that’s enough time for the air to clear. We’ll trick-or-treat in warm weather and fresh air. We’ll let Nana and Gramps spoil the kiddos while I try and figure out what to wear out of the 5 pairs of pants and 2 sweaters I brought.

The men stayed back to work and keep an eye on things. Kaiser has a suitcase in his car in case he can’t return home one night or gets stuck on the freeway. My brother is monitoring his girlfriend who is trapped in La Jolla.

We’re making plans to clean vents and change filters. To help friends still wondering if their homes are standing. To aid families who’s children are hospitalized with breathing troubles. To color pictures for the firefighters. To cry together.

You can help my neighbors, my friends, and my community by donating to the Santa Clarita Valley Disaster Coalition. Thank you.

Filed Under: Queenie Backup

…and the good news is my house didn’t burn down yet

October 23, 2007 by 34 Comments

It’s late and I’m exhausted. My kids coughed themselves to sleep and I’m too anxious to try and go to bed.

Turn on the national news and when you hear about the fires think of this family as lucky…so far. We are in our home. I have a laundry basket filled with essentials by my front door.

The air conditioning is on by recommendation of the authorities and we’re staying off the local roads unless we’re in an evacuation zone.

My son is coughing, but not badly. Meds and the indoor air are keeping him breathing without trouble. As I type this, a fourth fire has sprung up just miles from us.

If you are keeping track, we have one fire less than a mile to our northwest, we have another fire about 8 miles to our north, we have another fire about 3 miles to our east, and yet one more now to the southest that is about 4 miles away.


We could leave but hotels from San Diego to us are booked, not to mention the cost of missing work and staying away from home. We are not in an evacuation zone and authorities are advising we stay put and stay out of their way.

Protecting my kids is not an easy call today. Do we flee and risk sitting in traffic with horrible air quality and my son’s asthma? Do we stay put until the wind shifts and we are threatened directly? Do we get our butts to lax and make an impromptu trip to Nana’s house? Do we sit and wait?

We have had offers from friends that are just amazing. People are really wonderful. Homes to stay in, beds to lay on, tickets to Florida. The phone has been ringing non stop and the outpouring of concern is just overwhelming. Thank you all.

There have been many challenges this week. Making me really think and making me really take into account what I have. I have really good friends. I have a community of parent bloggers that I can count on. That I can share with. That I can relate to and help. I wouldn’t change them for the world, or for anyone. My children have seen the benefits of this community as well. My son’s allergies and asthma was helped by tips you all gave me. I got help for my PPD and become a better mother with your help. I’m proud of the community we’ve created and angry that a small percentage of people would attempt to intimidate or silence those of us who have gained so much through parent blogging. We’ve created a voice that is changing parenthood and I’m glad we can use our free speech as we engage in this new social medium. As we share photos and stories and advice and become virtual neighbors.  As we empower ourselves with books and opportunities and power.

I spent 72 hours attempting to make contact, personally, to discuss these challenges with certain people and have been met with no response. So publicly now I ask for the copyrighted photo of my minor daughter to be removed immediately.

There is a firestorm outside my door.

Filed Under: Queenie Backup
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