I had to sit down and commit this to memory right now.

Its 530am on the West Coast. Still very dark outside. And I just woke up, nursing the Princess, when a big white light started flashing, almost like a digital camera, outside (or was it on?) my bedroom window.

I sat straight up. Stared at it…looked around to see where it was coming from, and then it stopped.

My heart is still racing. I can’t find ANYTHING that would do that. I was starting to think I dreamed it, and then I noticed all three of our cats on the dresser in front of the window.

I just came down stairs to look around. Nothing. I can’t find anything.

My first thought was the house was on fire. Even though the light was nothing like a fire light.

Did I piss off Baby Cheeses with that last post? Is ET phoning home? What the hell just happened?

We’re on the second floor, by the way. Which means no one could have been standing outside the window.

I’m going to try and go back to bed now.

Daddy came home and called me “Sid Vicious.”My hair will lay down soon, right???

Its just not fun unless it makes Mommy want to cover her eyes.

Count Waffle’s the Terrible will go to nursery school today and celebrate Baby Cheese’s Birthday. At least, that’s what he keeps telling me.

We sent him, two days a week, three hours a day, to this particular nursery school because we loved their laid back attitude, great playground, and because I personally know, or know others who can vouch for ALL of the teachers.

We KNEW it was a Christian school, and we discussed how we would handle stuff like this…but we figured he’s just 2 1/2 and they really don’t mention the Bible or God or Jesus all that much. And any exposure to the subject would either go over his head or would be a nice, diversity lesson for him. (The Kaiser is an atheist, The Queen is somewhat agnostic, recovering Catholic and we’re pretty liberal.)

So when the note came home with the cute little Nursery School logo saying the kids would celebrate Christmas with a birthday party, I…ummm…freaked out. Only a little. I held the freak out in pretty good, for the most part.

I calmly approached the Kaiser to tell him what was up. I wanted to check his reaction to see if I was OVER reacting.
He was fine with it. No biggie. Seemed normal to him.

But in my Catholic upbringing, Christmas meant lots of mangers and animals and hay and advent calendars with chocolate and stuff. We never, ever, not even once associated it with a “birthday party.” This was a totally foreign concept to me. And the only thing I could associate it with was my crazy ass in laws. My sister-in-law was very excited once when my brother-in-law got to pick up Jerry Falwell from the airport to speak at their seminary. Does that explain enough? If you need more, see THIS POST.

Anyway, the Kaiser had great points about how kids are not going to understand any of the mumbo jumbo I was subjected to as a child and they sure do understand birthday parties. And its not like we’d keep the Count home from school just to avoid Baby Jesus. Totally valid points. And now, I’m fine with it. I have to be. I put him in this school, and something like this was bound to happen. And will happen again. And again.

And the Kaiser was dead on with kids understanding birthday parties. Because the Count is off to school this morning thinking he’s going to party all day long…with this guy–which I discovered when he said “Mommy, its baby Cheese’s Birthday. At Chuck E Cheese.”

The rules for this particular meme are as follows:

Remove the blog in the top spot from the following list and bump everyone up one place. Then add your blog to the bottom slot.
1. Annush
2. Vince
3. Hanuman
4. Running2Ks
5. Queen of Spain

Then you get to select five people to pass the love on to. Sorry kids, ignore me if you want, I understand
1. Sarah
2. Becky
3. Gretchen
4. KDubs
5. Adena

Now, on to the questions!

What were you doing 10 years ago?
I really believe its fate I’ve been tagged and asked this question right now. Exactly 10 years ago, nearly to the day, I was at the end of a horrible, abusive, destructive and evil relationship. I was making my way back from the West Coast to Michigan after a road trip that involved a gun and a baby that was never to be. After the dust settled I moved to Florida. I met my husband, and my real life began.

What were you doing one year ago (I forgot this one earlier, but here it is now)
I had just turned the big 3-0, which the Kaiser commemorated with some bling that was engraved with “29”–because I’m 29 forever! I was pregnant with Princess Peanut, getting ready for Christmas in Florida and here.

Five snacks you enjoy:

We went from THAT to snacks? Ok.
Snackwell’s Fat Free Devil’s Food cake cookies
Kettle corn
Coffee (that counts)
Any kind of candy
Chocolate (milk or vanilla, none of that bitter dark junk)

Five songs to which you know all the lyrics:

Anything by Sarah MacLachlan
Anything by Laurie Berkner
Anything seen or heard on Noggin or PBS Sprout
You Belong to Me, Patsy Cline (my wedding song)
The Canadian National Anthem

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire:

Pay off everything
Buy my parents a house and health care
Buy my husband’s family land in West Virginia
Set up college funds and trusts for the kiddos
Give lots to my old high school journalism program and my husband’s old hometown community museum

Five bad habits:

Too much time on the old computer
Too much time in front of the old fridge
Lazy
Leaving lights on
Not using coupons

Five things you like doing:

Kissing the kiddos
Taking long, hot baths
Gardening
Yoga
Blogging/writing

Five things you would never wear buy or get new again:

A bikini
A belly shirt
Pantyhose
Tights
Gold jewelry

Five favorite toys:

GOD, I mean, TIVO
Computer
TV
Auto doors on the Mom Van
Debit card

Megaphone
Telephone
Trusty SwordYup. That’s my freaking breast pump.

And to think for a nano second I was sad she didn’t get her brother’s blue eyes. Silly me.

Count Waffles the Terrible has started. He’s started that thing that makes all those without children cringe, and all those with children point and laugh.

“Mommy, where are all the Christmas Trees?”
“Are the Christmas Trees all at the farm, Mommy?”
“Is the farm down the street, Mommy?”
“Is the street big, Mommy?”
“Are we going fast in the car, Mommy?”
“Mommy, is that car just like our car?”
“Mommy, is that a Mommy in that car?”
“Mommy, is that car the same as our car?”
“Is that light green, Mommy?”
“Is that light red now, Mommy?”
“Mommy was that light green and then it was orange and then it was red?”
“Are we almost at school Mommy?”
“Mommy, are we on the street to school?”
“Mommy, are we going to school?”
“Am I in the car, Mommy?”
“Is this our car, Mommy?”
“Am I in my seat in our car, Mommy?”
“Mommy, is that a bird?”
“Mommy, is that a bird on the street to school?”
“Mommy, did the bird fly away?”
“Are we at my school, Mommy?”
“Are we getting out of the car now, Mommy?”
“Am I on the sidewalk now, Mommy?”
“Mommy, are we walking to my school?”
“Mommy, is this my class?”
“Mommy, is that my teacher?”
“Are those my friends, Mommy?”
“Bye.”

And that was just a 5 minute ride. Is it wrong to have wine at 11am?

In all the fuss of babies walking and Santa and stuff, we forgot to tell everyone there is a new design up at the QUEEN STORE!

The Kaiser and I think Prom Queen ’89 is hilarious. And it came out really good…all navy and faded. Go check it out!

Also, a word of warning…we got a new camera. I’m sure many, many “awwww” photos of the Count and the Princess will be coming. Soon.