Martinis, Pills, Deviled Eggs, and Lies

I expect nothing less from a former Rodeo Beauty Queen.

Cindy McCain is doing her Stepford wife, affluent roots damn proud.

In what can only be seen as propaganda, the McCain campaign put up a cutesy little blurb on their website called “Cindy’s Recipes.” Once again not realizing voters have brains, it was quickly noticed these so-called Cindy family favorites (that she must whip up between doing her nails and battling her pill addiction) were stolen from the Food Network.

Because as you know, those of us just dying to use Cindy’s McCain’s recipes at our next family gathering can’t possibly be the same demographic watching the Food Network.

There is a part of me that would love to go on and on and be snarky about Cindy’s pill popping, how she got nailed for stealing from her own charity, etc. But let’s face it-we all have demons. Do hers seem to fit the Stepford profile of coiffed trophy wife who aided in the demise of a marriage? – sure, but what I find more disturbing is the pandering.

Running against two candidates battling it out over who is more ‘down to earth’ and ‘not elitist’ the McCain campaign just tried to soften Cindy’s millionaire background by giving us recipes.

No really. They think we are THAT stupid.

Oh, well, she cooks! She must understand what it’s like to get dinner ready when you have a toddler at your heels and a preschooler screaming for Spongebob and a husband working overtime again so you can pay the mortgage. She MUST be one of us if she has all those RECIPES.

Even if those recipes had not been lifted from Rachel Ray and others, we’re not stupid enough to believe Cindy is anything other than the daughter of a millionaire, beauty queen, recovering pill addict who avoided prosecution on drug charges by entering a federal diversion program.

I’m going to go make tuna noodle casserole, then run my vacuum cleaner, then maybe get out of my sweatpants before cleaning up the cat litter. I’m going to call my NONmillionaire Dad who’s struggling with health insurance. Then I’m going to log onto my notebook and keep an eye on the McCain camp.

We’re watching, and you are fooling no one.

crossposted at MOMocrats

Gangsta-Geeks

Baratunde made me do it. Not really…but it’s hilarious anyway. Dear Mr. Cent, we have nothing but the utmost respect for your music. Please don’t shoot us.

http://www.meebo.com/rooms

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Elitist My Ass

It has been awhile since I’ve been back to my hometown near Detroit, Michigan. I took the kids there in early 2007; the cold and unemployment were a stark reminder of why I left.

The abandoned buildings. For Sale signs. The way the road goes from smooth to bumpy when you cross the state line. Boarded up windows, failed ‘revitalization’ efforts. Friends laid off. Friends looking for work. Friends moving to get work. Family leaving, family staying, family commuting to other states for part-time jobs and part-time pay.

Make no mistake, I LOVE my hometown. I LOVE the Midwest. I think anyone and everyone should live and work and grow in these cities and towns-but understand when I tell you that Senator Barack Obama is DEAD ON when he talks about the bitterness of residents.

Are you hearing me?

This former Midwest girl is telling you Obama is not being ‘elite’ or ‘out of touch’ –he could NOT be MORE in touch. He’s LISTENING and understanding that many of us who moved away and many of us that stayed are angry, frustrated, disappointed, disillusioned, and UNEMPLOYED.

In what world do Obama’s remarks constitute ‘looking down on’? I’m sorry, Senator Clinton-but are you HIGH? I am watching you right now, speaking in Indiana on CNN, and you are ‘somewhat taken aback’ by what Senator Obama said. Are you unaware that when life is as bad as it can possibly be, people turn to religion? Are you unaware that frustrated individuals tend to take up arms when they feel their very well being threatened by their surroundings?

Senator Clinton, let me be as clear as I possibly can here:

Barack Obama is giving voice to millions of us by speaking the TRUTH. He’s simply vocalizing exactly what I hear from my Uncle, from my High School friend, from my former teacher, from my now re-located parents. He is speaking about what he’s heard, what he’s been told, what he has seen.

Senator Obama’s remarks reminds me yet again that he is one of us. He GETS IT. He knows that I LEFT Detroit. I AM BITTER. I AM PISSED OFF. THERE ARE NO JOBS IN MY HOMETOWN. I couldn’t move my family back there if I WANTED TO.

When I do take trips back home it is depressing. My husband NEVER wants to visit because he can’t stand how dejected everyone is and how run down the whole place seems. Are there some amazing neighborhoods and jobs-of course. Is it horrible everywhere-of course not. Is it worse there than in many other places in the US-damn right.

Do you think I like living 3-thousand miles away from my family and friends? Do you think it’s fun for me to watch everyone I know get laid off, go into bankruptcy, lose their house, work two low paying jobs, move into their parents home? Do you think I am NOT bitter about any of this?

Spin it. Go ahead. Talk about how those remarks make him seem elite and condescending. It is so absurd that it only confirms for me that you and Senator McCain are COMPLETELY OUT OF TOUCH with what REAL Americans think and do and want.

I would suggest, however, that you take your rhetoric elsewhere. Because the more you yap about Obama being ‘elite’ -while he’s talking about how we really feel and you’re releasing 109 Million dollar tax returns- the more stupid you look.

Taking My Tits to See Bill Maher

Bill and I go way back.

I showed him my boobs.

Internetgeekgirl (aka Stephanie Agresta) got the tickets. Odds are you can follow my tweets live.

Here’s hoping he has some interesting guests I can boo, or applaud, or flash.

*updated: ummm, Stephanie fell asleep. No worries.

…and then the valet brought the Minivan around

I can talk a good game.

Hi, I’m Erin. Yes, I’m a blogger. Nice to meet you.

And then I drop words like ‘beta’ ‘tech’ ‘viral’ ‘widget’ ‘twitter’ ‘scalable’ and then drop names like ‘Arrington’ ‘Kawasaki’ and nod my head a lot.

It means I end up at places like the Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood eating chocolate cake at 1am with a table full of PR and web types. All while I watch the clock on my blackberry, wondering if the kids got to bed ok and if Nana remembered to give them both their new allergy medicine.

(me and Pete Cashmore, CEO of Mashable.com. He’s a sweetie.)

Part of me wants to race home, the other part wants to buy everyone another round and head to a club. I’m loving the opportunity blogging and twitter have brought, but am confused at the same time. SOCIAL media is all about being SOCIAL.

Originally uploaded by
((CC) Brian Solis, bub.blicio.us, briansolis.com)

I’m really good at the SOCIAL. But how do I continue down this path and raise two small kids and make sure their laundry is done? How do I attend all these conferences and the PTA meeting?

I stood there last night talking shop with a gaggle of web types, ordered another drink, discussed flying to San Fransisco for a day to attend a meet up, planned parties and mixers, chatted about yet another party tonight and quickly had to say ‘no, no…I’m not coming, tonight is my night out.’

In the back of my mind I’m wondering if Nana can babysit again and if Friday night I can sneak out for a few drinks with the movers and shakers.

No. No. Balance. Balance is good.

I’m going to go fold some kid socks and put away HotWheels cars and maybe empty the dishwasher and remind myself the only reason they want me there is because I bring those of us carpooling to t-ball and tivo-ing Elmo to the table.

Make no mistake, we belong at the table.

I just wish they could put a kids table next to the adult table and make it lunch, not cocktails.

John McCain Inspired My Husband to Blog

*crossposted at MOMocrats.com

How did he do it? By allegedly calling his wife a cunt.

Please don’t be surprised that an ex-POW would be ‘mean’ to a woman or have some temper issues.

As for Cindy McCain…other than looking like the perfect Stepford wife while standing next to him on stage, I don’t know much about her. Maybe she likes being called a cunt? Maybe under all that hairspray and makeup she’s some sex freak who gets off on being berated in public? Maybe she’s secretly plotting to publicly call her husband an asshole during his next big speech? Either way, I’m going to guess husband and wife name-calling occurs on SOME level in the McCain household. Maybe it doesn’t. All I know is the whole story had my husband writing.

MOMocrats, meet DADocrat Aaron Vest:

There’s a new dust up on the campaign trail for the McCain camp. You’ve probably already heard about the new book by Cliff Schecter, “The Real McCain”. In the book Schecter writes:

“Three reporters from Arizona, on the condition of anonymity, also let me in on another incident involving McCain’s intemperateness. In his 1992 Senate bid, McCain was joined on the campaign trail by his wife, Cindy, as well as campaign aide Doug Cole and consultant Wes Gullett. At one point, Cindy playfully twirled McCain’s hair and said, “You’re getting a little thin up there.” McCain’s face reddened, and he responded, “At least I don’t plaster on the makeup like a trollop, you cunt.” McCain’s excuse was that it had been a long day. If elected president of the United States, McCain would have many long days.”

And the outrage ensues.

Feminists are outraged by the use of the word cunt. The Morally Correct simply don’t like curse words at all, especially words like cunt. And many other people are just scared that McCain could take his notorious temper into White House and start hammering away at the button with his fist, red faced jowels flapping around wildly in the wind, while screaming “Ahmadinejad is a cunt!” People believe this could happen. They do. They really really do. And they are outraged. As a side note, I think it’s rather ironic that people would be “outraged” by his temper. But anyway…

I, for one, think that we should take a step back and give McCain the benefit of the doubt on this one. We may know about his voting record. We may know about his policies. We do know all about his heroics as POW. But what we don’t know very much about is Cindy McCain. It’s quite possible that she really is a cunt. And a big one at that. Have you ever spent a really long hard day with a really big cunt? It’d piss you off too. Especially if the cunt started making fun of your male pattern baldness.

This raises a serious question, how could he have not known she was a cunt before committing to her? Did he just assume that heck, he can just easily make her stop being a cunt just because he married her? Was his best man telling him he’d be able to do it in less than a year at almost no cost? Did McCain know the history of her family? I bet he’d feel pretty silly to find out now that there is a long history of being a cunt in her family. After he discovered he couldn’t get her to stop being a cunt he probably wished he had an exit strategy for the marriage. Or at least a pre-nup. Maybe he just planned on being married to her for 100 more years, or however long it took. Who knows really?

So while I’m perfectly willing to accept John McCain’s assessment that he married a cunt, I think that says more about his judgment than anything else. Honestly, I think the last thing we need right now is another cunt in the White House.

…Oh stop it Hillary supporters, I wasn’t talking to you.

Erin Kotecki Vest writes at Queenofspainblog.com her husband usually doesn’t write anywhere

Can’t Be Any More Bizzare Than My Panty Drawer

The chairman of Senator Hillary Clinton’s campaign, Terry McAuliffe was photographed in a rather odd way this weekend. I’m confused. And shaking my head. And wondering if he just didn’t NOTICE he was holding an Obama sign each time, or if he was being SUPER polite? This from the guy who is on my TV daily spouting vitriol. Weird.

Just as weird? A short vid I shot last week when my in-laws were here, given new life over at Utterz by either pervs or other Moms who’s panties are in the same, sad, shape. Why doesn’t Victoria’s Secret send me any PR e-mail?